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so sad, need hugs
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<blockquote data-quote="Sunlight" data-source="post: 29106" data-attributes="member: 97"><p>fran, I am very distraught as you can see. a wave of grief, anger, confusion, low self-esteem comes over me. when I say abuse, I am referring to emotional abuse of me not being able to trust, emotional abuse of sneaking out to meet someone, emotional abuse of seeing his email asking her over for a glass of wine. emotional stress of being lied to, and not knowing if he is tempted to cheat, etc. anyone in a relationship would be stressed if their SO had a history of this stuff. I am the first to admit, I do not have a large dating history having been married at 18 for 32 yrs.</p><p> </p><p>as I said his good is very good. some people would not be bothered by the other stuff. he has weaknesses that do not sit with me. however, I was hoping that could be worked on. he loved being treated well. it is hard for me to have people thinking all the best when it is my fault for not sharing the rest of the stuff we had trouble with. it gives a more complete picture of him. if his good side had not been so very good, I would not be crying and missing him. </p><p></p><p>I have favored him over my sons all along and try to balance things here. he is more than welcome to love his daughters above all, but I expect to be at least consulted when I am cut out of a trip we planned together and other "family " stuff. I know he and his daughter had discussed things, his daughter was just here for the weekend this past weekend and all seemed to be well. </p><p></p><p>well, none of this matters...he has chosen to end the relationship anyway.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sunlight, post: 29106, member: 97"] fran, I am very distraught as you can see. a wave of grief, anger, confusion, low self-esteem comes over me. when I say abuse, I am referring to emotional abuse of me not being able to trust, emotional abuse of sneaking out to meet someone, emotional abuse of seeing his email asking her over for a glass of wine. emotional stress of being lied to, and not knowing if he is tempted to cheat, etc. anyone in a relationship would be stressed if their SO had a history of this stuff. I am the first to admit, I do not have a large dating history having been married at 18 for 32 yrs. as I said his good is very good. some people would not be bothered by the other stuff. he has weaknesses that do not sit with me. however, I was hoping that could be worked on. he loved being treated well. it is hard for me to have people thinking all the best when it is my fault for not sharing the rest of the stuff we had trouble with. it gives a more complete picture of him. if his good side had not been so very good, I would not be crying and missing him. I have favored him over my sons all along and try to balance things here. he is more than welcome to love his daughters above all, but I expect to be at least consulted when I am cut out of a trip we planned together and other "family " stuff. I know he and his daughter had discussed things, his daughter was just here for the weekend this past weekend and all seemed to be well. well, none of this matters...he has chosen to end the relationship anyway. [/QUOTE]
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