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Talk to me about pot....
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<blockquote data-quote="Kathy813" data-source="post: 528451" data-attributes="member: 1967"><p>I think that DDD has a point. Did your contract say no drugs or drinking in the home or at all? Are you ready to be a policeman who constantly tears apart her room and car to search for evidence that she is smoking pot or drinking?</p><p></p><p>We recently wrote a contract with our difficult child for living at home with the help of the DBT counselor. The counselor pointed out that we cannot control what our difficult child does away from home. The contract we came up with was no drugs or alcohol in our home or coming home drunk or stoned. The counselor also suggested that we only look for drugs or alcohol if our difficult child gave us reason to suspect that she is using in the house.</p><p></p><p>I know everyone will not agree with that but in our case the thinking is that as she works through the DBT program she will learn other ways to regulate her emotions and cope with stress and anxiety and will not need the drugs or alcohol.</p><p></p><p>The counselor point blank asked me if I wanted to have to constantly be checking for evidence that she was using or drinking and I realized that I didn't want to do that anymore. So for now, our difficult child is acting polite, respectful, helping around the house, going to meetings, and starting a new job on Wednesday and that is enough for me.</p><p></p><p>If she is pulling a fast one on us I figure that we will eventually find out and the shame will be on her . . . not us.</p><p></p><p>~Kathy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Kathy813, post: 528451, member: 1967"] I think that DDD has a point. Did your contract say no drugs or drinking in the home or at all? Are you ready to be a policeman who constantly tears apart her room and car to search for evidence that she is smoking pot or drinking? We recently wrote a contract with our difficult child for living at home with the help of the DBT counselor. The counselor pointed out that we cannot control what our difficult child does away from home. The contract we came up with was no drugs or alcohol in our home or coming home drunk or stoned. The counselor also suggested that we only look for drugs or alcohol if our difficult child gave us reason to suspect that she is using in the house. I know everyone will not agree with that but in our case the thinking is that as she works through the DBT program she will learn other ways to regulate her emotions and cope with stress and anxiety and will not need the drugs or alcohol. The counselor point blank asked me if I wanted to have to constantly be checking for evidence that she was using or drinking and I realized that I didn't want to do that anymore. So for now, our difficult child is acting polite, respectful, helping around the house, going to meetings, and starting a new job on Wednesday and that is enough for me. If she is pulling a fast one on us I figure that we will eventually find out and the shame will be on her . . . not us. ~Kathy [/QUOTE]
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