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The other shoe has dropped.
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<blockquote data-quote="Dixies_fire" data-source="post: 599456" data-attributes="member: 16184"><p>This may not be a total disaster, it may cause her to grow up. It may cause her to see things differently about the guy too a man that doesn't get his kids often but yet needs a live in baby sitter to contend with them while they are there? Sure doesn't sound like marriage material to me. </p><p></p><p>I'd be careful because she doesn't have much history with this guy driving her to the altar so if he screws up big enough she still might leave. But if you make yourself the enemy of them she isn't going to talk to you about what is going on.</p><p>I would emphasize that getting married doesn't really make a family, it won't change the parts of him that she may already not like.</p><p>It isn't easy being married to a man who pays most of his income in child support to another woman when you and your kid are going without.</p><p></p><p>I had tk at 20. She gave me a reason to become successful to work hard, a young person can couch serf a person with a baby generally can't.</p><p></p><p>You need to strike a careful balance do not swoop in and so everything for her and don't make her feel ashamed about having this baby you will regret it later.</p><p></p><p>Good luck and I'm sorry you are sad.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Dixies_fire, post: 599456, member: 16184"] This may not be a total disaster, it may cause her to grow up. It may cause her to see things differently about the guy too a man that doesn't get his kids often but yet needs a live in baby sitter to contend with them while they are there? Sure doesn't sound like marriage material to me. I'd be careful because she doesn't have much history with this guy driving her to the altar so if he screws up big enough she still might leave. But if you make yourself the enemy of them she isn't going to talk to you about what is going on. I would emphasize that getting married doesn't really make a family, it won't change the parts of him that she may already not like. It isn't easy being married to a man who pays most of his income in child support to another woman when you and your kid are going without. I had tk at 20. She gave me a reason to become successful to work hard, a young person can couch serf a person with a baby generally can't. You need to strike a careful balance do not swoop in and so everything for her and don't make her feel ashamed about having this baby you will regret it later. Good luck and I'm sorry you are sad. [/QUOTE]
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