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The saga and burden continue
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<blockquote data-quote="scent of cedar" data-source="post: 589555" data-attributes="member: 1721"><p>We have felt that way too, Payla. I know you want him near so you can help, but would it be possible to find him something in a larger, nearby city? YMCA, homeless shelter, whatever. If you could find something workable, you could present him with that option and a move out date you will stick to unless he picks up and does the right thing.</p><p></p><p>We found it impossible to enforce anything or require any changes unless we had traction. Eventually, it would always come to difficult child finding a job through the internet, and co-signing for an apartment. I understand that is not what we are supposed to do? But when you are in a small town with limited options for employment and the difficult child does not want anything to change because HE is content...that was the only way we knew to change our own situation and retake control of our lives. (I am talking about a different difficult child than the one listed in my profile. Oy Vey.)</p><p></p><p>It's just too convenient that his money was gone just at the time you were out of town.</p><p></p><p>We used to hide money in various places in the house. When difficult child needed money, we would tell him where it was, one hiding place at a time. (We are gone for weeks or months at a time, some times.) </p><p></p><p>Eventually, that stopped working of course. difficult child would tear the house apart, find the money, and that would be that.</p><p></p><p>It's such a strange, nightmarish world we live in, when our children are in trouble.</p><p></p><p>Barbara</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="scent of cedar, post: 589555, member: 1721"] We have felt that way too, Payla. I know you want him near so you can help, but would it be possible to find him something in a larger, nearby city? YMCA, homeless shelter, whatever. If you could find something workable, you could present him with that option and a move out date you will stick to unless he picks up and does the right thing. We found it impossible to enforce anything or require any changes unless we had traction. Eventually, it would always come to difficult child finding a job through the internet, and co-signing for an apartment. I understand that is not what we are supposed to do? But when you are in a small town with limited options for employment and the difficult child does not want anything to change because HE is content...that was the only way we knew to change our own situation and retake control of our lives. (I am talking about a different difficult child than the one listed in my profile. Oy Vey.) It's just too convenient that his money was gone just at the time you were out of town. We used to hide money in various places in the house. When difficult child needed money, we would tell him where it was, one hiding place at a time. (We are gone for weeks or months at a time, some times.) Eventually, that stopped working of course. difficult child would tear the house apart, find the money, and that would be that. It's such a strange, nightmarish world we live in, when our children are in trouble. Barbara [/QUOTE]
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