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Parent Emeritus
There is just no hope for difficult child at this point
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 637375" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>GM, I've been done with that for years now. If 36 blames me for anything to my face, I hang up on him. A condition of his speaking to me is that he has to be pleasant and cut the crapola. It takes time and it is much easier to monitor things once you are living in separate places. What a stupid excuse to use drugs. My mother's intuition tells me she's already been using drugs, but is going to use this as a launching pad to blame you. You know what? Don't even answer her. No difficult child listens to us, especially in that crazy state of GFGness. They just want to hurt us.</p><p></p><p>STOP PLAYING THAT SICK VIDEOGAME!!!! She pushes the controller buttons and blasts you. QUIT THE GAME. Make her play her games without you. Don't respond to her. It is easier said than done, but if you can, remove yourself. If s he tells you she's going to become a drug addict again, my answer, if it were me TODAY (not ten years ago) would be a calm, "I don't want that and you know it, but I can't control you and if you choose to take drugs, that is going to be both your problem and your responsibility. I will not help you destroy yourself so no money is going to you, even if you end up homeless or in jail. You are an adult now and a smart young woman and you can make better choices than this one. If you go that route, you are doing it on your own." Maybe condense that a bit. </p><p></p><p>Then I'd put her on "radio silence." No matter what abuse she spews at you, act calm and walk away, even if you are shaking inside. </p><p></p><p>Hugs. We are all here pulling for you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 637375, member: 1550"] GM, I've been done with that for years now. If 36 blames me for anything to my face, I hang up on him. A condition of his speaking to me is that he has to be pleasant and cut the crapola. It takes time and it is much easier to monitor things once you are living in separate places. What a stupid excuse to use drugs. My mother's intuition tells me she's already been using drugs, but is going to use this as a launching pad to blame you. You know what? Don't even answer her. No difficult child listens to us, especially in that crazy state of GFGness. They just want to hurt us. STOP PLAYING THAT SICK VIDEOGAME!!!! She pushes the controller buttons and blasts you. QUIT THE GAME. Make her play her games without you. Don't respond to her. It is easier said than done, but if you can, remove yourself. If s he tells you she's going to become a drug addict again, my answer, if it were me TODAY (not ten years ago) would be a calm, "I don't want that and you know it, but I can't control you and if you choose to take drugs, that is going to be both your problem and your responsibility. I will not help you destroy yourself so no money is going to you, even if you end up homeless or in jail. You are an adult now and a smart young woman and you can make better choices than this one. If you go that route, you are doing it on your own." Maybe condense that a bit. Then I'd put her on "radio silence." No matter what abuse she spews at you, act calm and walk away, even if you are shaking inside. Hugs. We are all here pulling for you. [/QUOTE]
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There is just no hope for difficult child at this point
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