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'Tis the Season difficult child Question for others with experience
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 569131" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>I tend to think family should be together for holidays, regardless of difficult child issues, unless there is a threat of violence or some sort of abuse. Even difficult children need to be near family during these important days of the year, shoot maybe more so than the rest of us sometimes. </p><p></p><p>in my opinion grandma should not have to hide her booze. It's her house. difficult child's issue is not her issue. For that matter, difficult child's issue with drugs / alcohol is not your issue either. I know 19 doesn't quite seem like it, but difficult child is an adult and responsible for his own behavior. You are not responsible for his behavior. And to be blunt, it's really not your place to tell him what he can/can't do at grandma's house. (that's for her to do) However you can / should set the rules at your house. </p><p></p><p>In short, you can't control difficult child. Any attempt to do so would likely turn out bad and ruin everyone's holiday. The only thing you can control is what your reactions to certain behavior will be, what you may or may not do should he drink or use during the holiday with the family. </p><p></p><p>How is his relationship with grandma? Usually most difficult child's can manage to hold it together for a grandparents sake........well, just because it <strong>is</strong> grandma. Know what I mean?? Out of respect. You're not talking about a long stretch of time, so could difficult child hold it together? </p><p></p><p>If you don't think difficult child could resist temptation.........then you may decide it's best for everyone to not have him join the rest of the family. If so, perhaps you all could have a early celebration at your home so he is not completely excluded or something. </p><p></p><p>Hugs</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 569131, member: 84"] I tend to think family should be together for holidays, regardless of difficult child issues, unless there is a threat of violence or some sort of abuse. Even difficult children need to be near family during these important days of the year, shoot maybe more so than the rest of us sometimes. in my opinion grandma should not have to hide her booze. It's her house. difficult child's issue is not her issue. For that matter, difficult child's issue with drugs / alcohol is not your issue either. I know 19 doesn't quite seem like it, but difficult child is an adult and responsible for his own behavior. You are not responsible for his behavior. And to be blunt, it's really not your place to tell him what he can/can't do at grandma's house. (that's for her to do) However you can / should set the rules at your house. In short, you can't control difficult child. Any attempt to do so would likely turn out bad and ruin everyone's holiday. The only thing you can control is what your reactions to certain behavior will be, what you may or may not do should he drink or use during the holiday with the family. How is his relationship with grandma? Usually most difficult child's can manage to hold it together for a grandparents sake........well, just because it [B]is[/B] grandma. Know what I mean?? Out of respect. You're not talking about a long stretch of time, so could difficult child hold it together? If you don't think difficult child could resist temptation.........then you may decide it's best for everyone to not have him join the rest of the family. If so, perhaps you all could have a early celebration at your home so he is not completely excluded or something. Hugs [/QUOTE]
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'Tis the Season difficult child Question for others with experience
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