Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Too Much difficult child--No Patience left for typical teen Issues
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Farmwife" data-source="post: 334773" data-attributes="member: 8617"><p>I know how frightening the teen years can be. Just wanted to give you some insight from my own experiences when I was a similar aged young lady.</p><p> </p><p>I was "cutting" in junior high but only because I saw a popular girl do it. I may very well have been depressed. Had a bad home life, later as an adult diagnosed with bipolar. Just as a history for comparison I did have my share of behaviors. I wasn't an easy kid.</p><p> </p><p>I was sexually active a few days after I turned 15 so it is not uncommon at your daughters age group. I did get drunk a couple times in high school, experimented with a couple seemingly benign things. It never amounted to much was just exploring. I may have been considered promiscuous by parental standards but was pretty much average by teen standards. I also made ditching an artform since a cool girl I knew showed me how. I had been so sheltered that I got out of control from the feeling of freedom and choice.</p><p> </p><p>Yes, teens do have sex, teens do party and teens do things they probably shouldn't. Todays teens have a lot more media pressure and messages than I did. The drugs are scarier. </p><p> </p><p>Flash forward 20 years. I had more fallout in my life from my diagnosis than any teen choices left me with. Grant it I made bad choices that stuck with me like marrying my high school sweetheart and not going to college. For the most part though that was just a part of growing up. I survived, my parents did but divorced later. I'm as well adjusted and stable as a bi polar person can be. I got my life in order and am for the most part happy with the exception of difficult child issues.</p><p> </p><p>My difficult child is a real pain sometimes but my strategy with him is open, frank and honest conversations. I tell him *gasp* the real truth about my experiences. Then rather than simply say "don't do that" I can say "I did do that, it was fun at the time but let me explain why it ended up being a bad idea". He is very open with me about things his friends are doing. Let me assure you that todays teens are doing things that frighten the heck out of me.</p><p> </p><p>My parents made the mistake of having me fear their authority because I was always in trouble. I hid everything I did and never sought their counsel. They were strict and it drove me to act out more than kids who had easy parents. With the lack of reasonable choices I snuck bad ones. </p><p> </p><p>As soon as difficult child starts socializing we will provide him with condoms and no questions asked rides should a friend with a car end up not sober. I told him that I know he is going to do what he wants and just asked him to be careful and not to $%^^& up too bad. He knows he can come to me without fear if he gets himself into a sticky situation.</p><p> </p><p>That's all any parent can hope for.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Farmwife, post: 334773, member: 8617"] I know how frightening the teen years can be. Just wanted to give you some insight from my own experiences when I was a similar aged young lady. I was "cutting" in junior high but only because I saw a popular girl do it. I may very well have been depressed. Had a bad home life, later as an adult diagnosed with bipolar. Just as a history for comparison I did have my share of behaviors. I wasn't an easy kid. I was sexually active a few days after I turned 15 so it is not uncommon at your daughters age group. I did get drunk a couple times in high school, experimented with a couple seemingly benign things. It never amounted to much was just exploring. I may have been considered promiscuous by parental standards but was pretty much average by teen standards. I also made ditching an artform since a cool girl I knew showed me how. I had been so sheltered that I got out of control from the feeling of freedom and choice. Yes, teens do have sex, teens do party and teens do things they probably shouldn't. Todays teens have a lot more media pressure and messages than I did. The drugs are scarier. Flash forward 20 years. I had more fallout in my life from my diagnosis than any teen choices left me with. Grant it I made bad choices that stuck with me like marrying my high school sweetheart and not going to college. For the most part though that was just a part of growing up. I survived, my parents did but divorced later. I'm as well adjusted and stable as a bi polar person can be. I got my life in order and am for the most part happy with the exception of difficult child issues. My difficult child is a real pain sometimes but my strategy with him is open, frank and honest conversations. I tell him *gasp* the real truth about my experiences. Then rather than simply say "don't do that" I can say "I did do that, it was fun at the time but let me explain why it ended up being a bad idea". He is very open with me about things his friends are doing. Let me assure you that todays teens are doing things that frighten the heck out of me. My parents made the mistake of having me fear their authority because I was always in trouble. I hid everything I did and never sought their counsel. They were strict and it drove me to act out more than kids who had easy parents. With the lack of reasonable choices I snuck bad ones. As soon as difficult child starts socializing we will provide him with condoms and no questions asked rides should a friend with a car end up not sober. I told him that I know he is going to do what he wants and just asked him to be careful and not to $%^^& up too bad. He knows he can come to me without fear if he gets himself into a sticky situation. That's all any parent can hope for. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Too Much difficult child--No Patience left for typical teen Issues
Top