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<blockquote data-quote="TerryJ2" data-source="post: 115407" data-attributes="member: 3419"><p>Gosh, I don't know. The testing may help with-that.</p><p></p><p>I don't know if this is the same but it may be ... My son was weird about accepting compliments, too. Of course, he was younger, but at any rate, I said something like "Good job!" and he stomped off and slammed his door.</p><p></p><p>I followed him and asked him what was going on, and luckily, he was able to verbalize it. He said I sounded like I was being sarcastic (I can be!) and was making fun of him. husband was standing there and he said, "No, mom was serious. I saw it too (don't recall what "it" was now) and you did a good job."</p><p></p><p>"Well, it just makes me feel bad." </p><p></p><p>I told him I was sorry if I ever said something sarcastic like, "Good job, feeding the dogs and leaving a trail of dog food across the floor all the way to China," and that I would pay more attention to my words and attitude, and that this time I was truly not sarcastic and I really meant he had done a good job.</p><p></p><p>Very soon after, something happened again where I complimented him, and I could see him start to turn away. I immediately reminded him that I was being serious and I meant it, and I repeated it and had him nod, in a sort of role-play, and I touched his shoulders and asked him if he understood. He wasn't happy but accepted it, with-the caveat that I was saying it too loudly (apparently my emphasis was too dramatic and it alarmed him).</p><p></p><p>After a few more times, he was fine, until I was sarcastic again ... in the car ... and I was quick to point out that I was kidding and I had hoped I hadn't hurt his feelings. He said, "I KNOW THAT, Mom! I can tell the difference now!"</p><p></p><p>LOL!</p><p></p><p>Anyway, sometimes you have to literally teach these kids intonations and sarcasm and enthusiasm and he's mixing them all up?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TerryJ2, post: 115407, member: 3419"] Gosh, I don't know. The testing may help with-that. I don't know if this is the same but it may be ... My son was weird about accepting compliments, too. Of course, he was younger, but at any rate, I said something like "Good job!" and he stomped off and slammed his door. I followed him and asked him what was going on, and luckily, he was able to verbalize it. He said I sounded like I was being sarcastic (I can be!) and was making fun of him. husband was standing there and he said, "No, mom was serious. I saw it too (don't recall what "it" was now) and you did a good job." "Well, it just makes me feel bad." I told him I was sorry if I ever said something sarcastic like, "Good job, feeding the dogs and leaving a trail of dog food across the floor all the way to China," and that I would pay more attention to my words and attitude, and that this time I was truly not sarcastic and I really meant he had done a good job. Very soon after, something happened again where I complimented him, and I could see him start to turn away. I immediately reminded him that I was being serious and I meant it, and I repeated it and had him nod, in a sort of role-play, and I touched his shoulders and asked him if he understood. He wasn't happy but accepted it, with-the caveat that I was saying it too loudly (apparently my emphasis was too dramatic and it alarmed him). After a few more times, he was fine, until I was sarcastic again ... in the car ... and I was quick to point out that I was kidding and I had hoped I hadn't hurt his feelings. He said, "I KNOW THAT, Mom! I can tell the difference now!" LOL! Anyway, sometimes you have to literally teach these kids intonations and sarcasm and enthusiasm and he's mixing them all up? [/QUOTE]
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