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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 573468" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>Wow, thank goodness some sanity still reigns in the States, MWM <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p>Well, French children just would not answer back to adults in authority - or, rather, if they do, they are sharply and consistently corrected. Some would say that's a good thing (certainly those up in arms about how rude and uncouth many British youngsters are, for example). As always, maybe it's a question of a happy medium My downstairs neighbours, for example, are absolute fanatics and god knows what it is doing to their little girl - they scream and shout at her if she so much as raises her voice or don't do what they say immediately. But they're strange people generally and I don't know if they're typical. The thing is though... there's being naturally inquisitive and curious, having a personhood even though you are a child and... there's being rude. J sometimes is rude (less than he was though that could all be famous last words) and I don't like it. I don't expect a child to kowtow to me or not be a natural child but I do expect a level of mutual respect in the relationship. Well, I don't know if expect is the right word since I can expect it all I like with J, it is not always forthcoming... I do think a child speaking insolently to adults is a real worry, for themselves not least and their social relationships, their functioning as human beings. No one should speak insultingly to anybody. So I definitely think it must be addressed... even though I actually don't know how. Maybe it's the 64,000 dollar question for all parents of oppositional/difficult children, I don't know. </p><p>I'm glad you like J (albeit from a distance <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> ), MWM! I don't know exactly what he has going on (as you all know...) but he isn't really your average child. Sometimes he looks like one but... it's a bit of an illusion. He may not need to be described with labels other than hyperactive, which he clearly is, but he is an unusual personality, not your neuro-typical child. I'm grappling with acceptance of that - or, rather, I'm grappling with accepting the challenging rather than the delightful parts of that <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 573468, member: 11227"] Wow, thank goodness some sanity still reigns in the States, MWM :) Well, French children just would not answer back to adults in authority - or, rather, if they do, they are sharply and consistently corrected. Some would say that's a good thing (certainly those up in arms about how rude and uncouth many British youngsters are, for example). As always, maybe it's a question of a happy medium My downstairs neighbours, for example, are absolute fanatics and god knows what it is doing to their little girl - they scream and shout at her if she so much as raises her voice or don't do what they say immediately. But they're strange people generally and I don't know if they're typical. The thing is though... there's being naturally inquisitive and curious, having a personhood even though you are a child and... there's being rude. J sometimes is rude (less than he was though that could all be famous last words) and I don't like it. I don't expect a child to kowtow to me or not be a natural child but I do expect a level of mutual respect in the relationship. Well, I don't know if expect is the right word since I can expect it all I like with J, it is not always forthcoming... I do think a child speaking insolently to adults is a real worry, for themselves not least and their social relationships, their functioning as human beings. No one should speak insultingly to anybody. So I definitely think it must be addressed... even though I actually don't know how. Maybe it's the 64,000 dollar question for all parents of oppositional/difficult children, I don't know. I'm glad you like J (albeit from a distance :) ), MWM! I don't know exactly what he has going on (as you all know...) but he isn't really your average child. Sometimes he looks like one but... it's a bit of an illusion. He may not need to be described with labels other than hyperactive, which he clearly is, but he is an unusual personality, not your neuro-typical child. I'm grappling with acceptance of that - or, rather, I'm grappling with accepting the challenging rather than the delightful parts of that :) [/QUOTE]
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