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Trying to legislate good parenting
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<blockquote data-quote="mstang67chic" data-source="post: 39154" data-attributes="member: 2459"><p>Where I live, the judge who handles juvenile cases basically orders parenting classes to the parents of all children who pass through his court room more than a time or two. husband and I were some of these parents. For us, it was the biggest waste of time. I tried to go into it with an open mind, because as someone else has said here, there are always things we can learn. The reality of it though was that the techniques taught in this class were ones geared towards "typical" kids who are acting out of their own accord and not because of the results/symptoms of any diagnosis's. The instructor would call on husband or I and would always be flabbergasted and frustrated with us when we would say "Yeah that's a good theory but it won't work and this is why". She just kept telling us that we weren't doing it right or we weren't consistant enough. If we would say that that punishment wouldn't work because our son doesn't care, her response would be that we have to MAKE him care. Huh???? Yeah, THAT'S going to happen. Don't get me wrong, this lady was very sincere and had been doing this for a long time. She just didn't have a clue. It's like she thought that this stuff should work on every kid because it was basic respect and common sense. Finally someone pulled her aside (the classes were held at a place that difficult child receieve other service and the people there knew the situation and history) and filled her in on our specific situation. She never really called on us again.</p><p></p><p>With that said though, there WERE parents there who were interested and did benefit from the techniques. But there were also parents there who did nothing but doodle on their paper or whisper to each other during the entire class. They were only there because they were ordered to or because it would make them look better because they could say that they took this class to learn how to be a better parent, although they didn't change any of their parenting views.</p><p></p><p>While I agree that there are always parents who will benefit from these types of things......you can't just make everyone do this and expect it to work. There are too many factors involved in the different kids and families. And for the government to step in and say that all failing kids WILL fit into this square hole and that will fix it all is asinine. I hope someone with some sense in SC will speak up and inform these legislators that they are clueless.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="mstang67chic, post: 39154, member: 2459"] Where I live, the judge who handles juvenile cases basically orders parenting classes to the parents of all children who pass through his court room more than a time or two. husband and I were some of these parents. For us, it was the biggest waste of time. I tried to go into it with an open mind, because as someone else has said here, there are always things we can learn. The reality of it though was that the techniques taught in this class were ones geared towards "typical" kids who are acting out of their own accord and not because of the results/symptoms of any diagnosis's. The instructor would call on husband or I and would always be flabbergasted and frustrated with us when we would say "Yeah that's a good theory but it won't work and this is why". She just kept telling us that we weren't doing it right or we weren't consistant enough. If we would say that that punishment wouldn't work because our son doesn't care, her response would be that we have to MAKE him care. Huh???? Yeah, THAT'S going to happen. Don't get me wrong, this lady was very sincere and had been doing this for a long time. She just didn't have a clue. It's like she thought that this stuff should work on every kid because it was basic respect and common sense. Finally someone pulled her aside (the classes were held at a place that difficult child receieve other service and the people there knew the situation and history) and filled her in on our specific situation. She never really called on us again. With that said though, there WERE parents there who were interested and did benefit from the techniques. But there were also parents there who did nothing but doodle on their paper or whisper to each other during the entire class. They were only there because they were ordered to or because it would make them look better because they could say that they took this class to learn how to be a better parent, although they didn't change any of their parenting views. While I agree that there are always parents who will benefit from these types of things......you can't just make everyone do this and expect it to work. There are too many factors involved in the different kids and families. And for the government to step in and say that all failing kids WILL fit into this square hole and that will fix it all is asinine. I hope someone with some sense in SC will speak up and inform these legislators that they are clueless. [/QUOTE]
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