gcvmom
Here we go again!
I have absolutely HAD IT with difficult child 1's homework issues. Up to my eyeballs had it. Just done, Done, DONE with nagging him, lecturing him, yelling at him, revoking privileges, dangling carrots, having husband talk to him, asking for his own input. Just done.
Nothing we've tried motivates him. CASE IN POINT: I found out on Saturday evening after checking his grades online that a book report was due Monday. I asked difficult child 1 about it and he was genuinely clueless. I emailed the teacher about it. She replied on Sunday that she was certain she told him about it (it was assigned October 26th, the week before he transferred to that class ) and gave him the paperwork for it when he first came to her class and has been talking about it all quarter. It's also been posted on her website since then. She said it was actually due on Wednesday (today) and that he could download the forms he would need.
So I printed out the forms for him and he spent some time working on it Sunday night. Fortunately, he had a book he'd just read that was acceptable for this assignment.
He worked on it a bit Monday as well, but didn't make nearly the progress he needed to. Last night I got home and he was laying in bed watching TV -- the assignment was NOT finished! AAAARRRGGGG!!! He has no drive to get it done. I got him up early today so he could spend some more time on it, but he still couldn't finish it and the time he did spend on it was very slow going.
I told him to go in to see the teacher before school and ask for an extension. Maybe he'll get lucky.
After ranting to her on the phone today, my mother, in her infinite wisdom, suggested we hire a tutor to shift the problem over to someone else. It is just affecting our relationship with him too, too negatively. I cannot be his mother AND his teacher AND his therapist AND... you get the idea. Something here has to give, and being his mother is more important right now.
So I want to give this a try (provided husband is behind it 100%, which I think he will be). The problem I'm having is choosing where to send him.
Do we hire one of those professional tutor companies?
Do we hire a highschool student? Should it be a boy? A girl? Should they come to our house or should I send him to their house (fewer distractions in my opinion)?
Is once a week enough?
What other questions should I be asking?
Nothing we've tried motivates him. CASE IN POINT: I found out on Saturday evening after checking his grades online that a book report was due Monday. I asked difficult child 1 about it and he was genuinely clueless. I emailed the teacher about it. She replied on Sunday that she was certain she told him about it (it was assigned October 26th, the week before he transferred to that class ) and gave him the paperwork for it when he first came to her class and has been talking about it all quarter. It's also been posted on her website since then. She said it was actually due on Wednesday (today) and that he could download the forms he would need.
So I printed out the forms for him and he spent some time working on it Sunday night. Fortunately, he had a book he'd just read that was acceptable for this assignment.
He worked on it a bit Monday as well, but didn't make nearly the progress he needed to. Last night I got home and he was laying in bed watching TV -- the assignment was NOT finished! AAAARRRGGGG!!! He has no drive to get it done. I got him up early today so he could spend some more time on it, but he still couldn't finish it and the time he did spend on it was very slow going.
I told him to go in to see the teacher before school and ask for an extension. Maybe he'll get lucky.
After ranting to her on the phone today, my mother, in her infinite wisdom, suggested we hire a tutor to shift the problem over to someone else. It is just affecting our relationship with him too, too negatively. I cannot be his mother AND his teacher AND his therapist AND... you get the idea. Something here has to give, and being his mother is more important right now.
So I want to give this a try (provided husband is behind it 100%, which I think he will be). The problem I'm having is choosing where to send him.
Do we hire one of those professional tutor companies?
Do we hire a highschool student? Should it be a boy? A girl? Should they come to our house or should I send him to their house (fewer distractions in my opinion)?
Is once a week enough?
What other questions should I be asking?