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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 247642" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>Thanks, Susie and DDD! OK, I have paperwork ready and am finishing laundry, then I have a decent dinner to finish cooking and eat.</p><p></p><p>Now, this is the part that comes to my mind as making me lose my cool, potentially: the PO is the one who has stood up in court, out of the blue, previously and said things like "well, I think the mother should be held accountable" (never mind that I didn't do anything wrong), "well, <em><strong>I</strong></em> don't know that" after I just said something to judge (and each time, the judge has found/seen proof that I was telling the truth), etc. When the PO does/says these things, it makes my blood boil. Before this last arraignment, I thought she was doing this to either try to get me in trouble instead of difficult child or because she was trying to say that she didn't have proof in her hand, so she could not take my word. But, I felt it implied to the judge and others that my word couldn't be taken. </p><p></p><p>Then, at this last arraignment, she did it again (she's done it EVERY time), but it was right after I had talked to her in hallway before court and she was trying to say that she hadn't known that difficult child had been hurting himself and that she wanted him in juvy because I could not supervise him. So, that blows the theory that she's trying to blame me because she's so sympathetic for difficult child that she wants me punished instead of him. And, it blows the theory that she was <em>only</em> trying to convey that as a PO, she needs proof in hand instead of just taking a parent's word- because I KNOW (and she admitted) that she had read that difficult child was self-harming, then in the next breath said again that she didn't know he was hurting himself.</p><p></p><p>Now, if she's still trying to justify this in her own mind that she just CANNOT believe a word I say, I don't know. But, what I'm leading to here (LOL!) is that this is where I feel sure that I show visible signs that I am livid with her. I did this at the arraignment when the judge asked about difficult child's previous competency evaluation and MST services and PO said things that implied I was lieing or couldn't be trusted. It infuriates me because I have not lied and have history for 25 years, plus, that I am a productive citizen who does not break the law and is doing everything I know for my son for 14+ years.</p><p></p><p>So, does anyone have any suggestions about how I can handle this part better? My brain tells me that if I can remain calm and cool, it will keep the focus on what she's saying and it might become more obvious who is the person causing a problem and not being objective. But, I find it difficult to remain calm. I find it offensive and in my heart, I blame her for getting so caught up in whatever her issue is that she failed to do her job for difficult child and now look where he is and SHE wants him in juvy. I want to strangle her. LOL!</p><p></p><p>OK, I will try to keep in mind that this is my opportunity to tell the judge what needs to be said to get difficult child the help he needs. So, I should not be concentrating on PO, as you ladies have reminded me. But I really do think I need to try to convey that if she's staying in our lives, it is a detriment (sp). I think she is toxic for us.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 247642, member: 3699"] Thanks, Susie and DDD! OK, I have paperwork ready and am finishing laundry, then I have a decent dinner to finish cooking and eat. Now, this is the part that comes to my mind as making me lose my cool, potentially: the PO is the one who has stood up in court, out of the blue, previously and said things like "well, I think the mother should be held accountable" (never mind that I didn't do anything wrong), "well, [I][B]I[/B][/I] don't know that" after I just said something to judge (and each time, the judge has found/seen proof that I was telling the truth), etc. When the PO does/says these things, it makes my blood boil. Before this last arraignment, I thought she was doing this to either try to get me in trouble instead of difficult child or because she was trying to say that she didn't have proof in her hand, so she could not take my word. But, I felt it implied to the judge and others that my word couldn't be taken. Then, at this last arraignment, she did it again (she's done it EVERY time), but it was right after I had talked to her in hallway before court and she was trying to say that she hadn't known that difficult child had been hurting himself and that she wanted him in juvy because I could not supervise him. So, that blows the theory that she's trying to blame me because she's so sympathetic for difficult child that she wants me punished instead of him. And, it blows the theory that she was [I]only[/I] trying to convey that as a PO, she needs proof in hand instead of just taking a parent's word- because I KNOW (and she admitted) that she had read that difficult child was self-harming, then in the next breath said again that she didn't know he was hurting himself. Now, if she's still trying to justify this in her own mind that she just CANNOT believe a word I say, I don't know. But, what I'm leading to here (LOL!) is that this is where I feel sure that I show visible signs that I am livid with her. I did this at the arraignment when the judge asked about difficult child's previous competency evaluation and MST services and PO said things that implied I was lieing or couldn't be trusted. It infuriates me because I have not lied and have history for 25 years, plus, that I am a productive citizen who does not break the law and is doing everything I know for my son for 14+ years. So, does anyone have any suggestions about how I can handle this part better? My brain tells me that if I can remain calm and cool, it will keep the focus on what she's saying and it might become more obvious who is the person causing a problem and not being objective. But, I find it difficult to remain calm. I find it offensive and in my heart, I blame her for getting so caught up in whatever her issue is that she failed to do her job for difficult child and now look where he is and SHE wants him in juvy. I want to strangle her. LOL! OK, I will try to keep in mind that this is my opportunity to tell the judge what needs to be said to get difficult child the help he needs. So, I should not be concentrating on PO, as you ladies have reminded me. But I really do think I need to try to convey that if she's staying in our lives, it is a detriment (sp). I think she is toxic for us. [/QUOTE]
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