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<blockquote data-quote="allhaileris" data-source="post: 549702" data-attributes="member: 5663"><p>I don't see my parents very often, maybe once a year because it's just better like that. And a holiday with them, no way. Plus every time I go back to LA I remind myself why I moved. Horrible people everywhere, smog, traffic, etc.</p><p></p><p>And the spanking thing, your child was spitting at you and threatening you, so you hurt him physically. Why not give him a hug instead? He's crying for your attention and you're pushing him away. My daughter gets jealous if I do things out of the house without her, spend too much time with a houseguest or the such. But I'd never punish her for that. She's a kid, an only child with no real friends, she can't just tell me "hey, I'm lonely and I miss you", instead she acts up. If I take some time to really pay attention to her during those times, and then back it up with what I need to do, it's easier on her.</p><p></p><p>I'd guess that your mom did something, or treated him in a way that makes him not like her. What was that? Maybe if she took more time to spend one on one with him, that would help? Sometimes when kids are treated like the bad kid, they'll be the bad kid. </p><p></p><p>And I assume you know by now what the triggers are for causing meltdowns? I know my child's and try to steer her away from them when I can see that coming. If that means she needs alone time while the family is eating dinner, then so be it. If that means giving in to an extra whatever that you wouldn't normally allow, then do it, you're on vacation. Do you offer him rewards for a good day? I hear punishments, but not rewards.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="allhaileris, post: 549702, member: 5663"] I don't see my parents very often, maybe once a year because it's just better like that. And a holiday with them, no way. Plus every time I go back to LA I remind myself why I moved. Horrible people everywhere, smog, traffic, etc. And the spanking thing, your child was spitting at you and threatening you, so you hurt him physically. Why not give him a hug instead? He's crying for your attention and you're pushing him away. My daughter gets jealous if I do things out of the house without her, spend too much time with a houseguest or the such. But I'd never punish her for that. She's a kid, an only child with no real friends, she can't just tell me "hey, I'm lonely and I miss you", instead she acts up. If I take some time to really pay attention to her during those times, and then back it up with what I need to do, it's easier on her. I'd guess that your mom did something, or treated him in a way that makes him not like her. What was that? Maybe if she took more time to spend one on one with him, that would help? Sometimes when kids are treated like the bad kid, they'll be the bad kid. And I assume you know by now what the triggers are for causing meltdowns? I know my child's and try to steer her away from them when I can see that coming. If that means she needs alone time while the family is eating dinner, then so be it. If that means giving in to an extra whatever that you wouldn't normally allow, then do it, you're on vacation. Do you offer him rewards for a good day? I hear punishments, but not rewards. [/QUOTE]
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