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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 549717" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p>OH this is so tough. I now how desperate it can become when you are away from where you use your typical methods to calm your child. It really puts you in a stressful place where you might make a bad choice so now that you know it can rise to that level you have some hard decisions to make. We all make mistakes. What you do from now on is the ticket. </p><p></p><p>I agree you need to present your mom with more accurate information. There are some books about Aspergers that may be much better, especially those that suggest how to discipline and show the perspective of the child on the spectrum. It is so important that you not put yourself in those situations there have been times we have taken time outs from going on family events. My dad has never ever taken care of my son but has had all of the other kids stay over at his house. I have shared with my family about not taking things personally but we know in our hearts that is even hard for us some days. I am sorry, but until your mom understands you may have to explain to her that for now you and your therapists (lol, us...kidding) are working on some specific methods to help difficult child calm down and control his behaviors and also to learn social skills so he is unable to be in situations where he is routine is not very consistent. That means you may not be able to come to visit with him for a while but of course talking on the phone and any other support is really welcomed. I dont know if that might work but what you went through ends up eating our kids' self esteem away. It is not worth it. Grandma will recover when she finally understands but even if she doesn't, in the end, our responsibility is to our kids. We have but one chance to do it right. HUGE hugs to you..... you are a dear.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 549717, member: 12886"] OH this is so tough. I now how desperate it can become when you are away from where you use your typical methods to calm your child. It really puts you in a stressful place where you might make a bad choice so now that you know it can rise to that level you have some hard decisions to make. We all make mistakes. What you do from now on is the ticket. I agree you need to present your mom with more accurate information. There are some books about Aspergers that may be much better, especially those that suggest how to discipline and show the perspective of the child on the spectrum. It is so important that you not put yourself in those situations there have been times we have taken time outs from going on family events. My dad has never ever taken care of my son but has had all of the other kids stay over at his house. I have shared with my family about not taking things personally but we know in our hearts that is even hard for us some days. I am sorry, but until your mom understands you may have to explain to her that for now you and your therapists (lol, us...kidding) are working on some specific methods to help difficult child calm down and control his behaviors and also to learn social skills so he is unable to be in situations where he is routine is not very consistent. That means you may not be able to come to visit with him for a while but of course talking on the phone and any other support is really welcomed. I dont know if that might work but what you went through ends up eating our kids' self esteem away. It is not worth it. Grandma will recover when she finally understands but even if she doesn't, in the end, our responsibility is to our kids. We have but one chance to do it right. HUGE hugs to you..... you are a dear. [/QUOTE]
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