Well, my computer is back up and running. I'm having a rough couple of days. Everything I see or do is reminding me of John and while I know this is normal, I just don't see how I am going to get through this. He was a part of my life for 30 years and well, how do you go on after that? I'm taking it one minute at a time now, and I am going to a support group on Tuesday if I can make my car go in that direction. I've been trying to do "normal" things today, like laundry and washing dishes, but I can only do that for so long. I've been listening to music and alternating between crying my eyes out and laughing and remembering good times.
I am just so lonely. We were together 24/7 when we weren't at work and it's so hard to be completely alone this weekend. It's the first weekend since he passed away that I am totally alone. My mom went home last week and Alex is at his girlfriend's house. He comes home tomorrow night, and I knew I had to get through this first weekend to even begin to heal.
Anyway, I am going to try and find something that I feel like eating, which is not much these days, and try and find something mind-numbing on TV to watch. I am just so tired, sad and so, so lonely and missing my best friend and half of me that I can't think clearly right now.
Thank you all again for being here for me right now...