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Want to beat this kid, I hate her!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 620823" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Nancy</p><p></p><p>I understand your anger and frustration at Angel's immature behavior. However, in a weird way.......I see her point of view too. It can't be easy knowing that your sibs and family suffer consequences for your actions/diagnosis. It isn't fair. It isn't right. And it seems given her response......that perhaps Angel is harboring some anger herself over it. I can't say I blame her much. Perhaps because I had similar experiences for different reasons. </p><p></p><p>That said, the friend is 18 yrs old. She is an adult who can decide whom she picks for friends, regardless of her parents approval. If there are consequences to those choices, then she should be prepared to face them. She knew the risk of breaking the rules. </p><p></p><p>Sadly, most parents today seem to swing from one extreme to another instead of finding a middle ground with their kids. The teen years should be a time when you are teaching your children to think and act independently from yourself while they are still protected by their parents. </p><p></p><p>I've never been one to even attempt to choose my children's friends. In that respect, you're just shooting yourself in the foot. Kids will friend whomever they choose regardless of rules and consequences. At best you're just encouraging them to lie to you and to sneak around, which is not good. </p><p></p><p>Once my kids were 18 they were treated like adults. Well, they were to to varying degrees throughout the teen years. The only thing was they had to follow house rules. But outside of that they had complete freedom. </p><p></p><p>My home was filled with difficult children while my kids were growing up. Most certainly not all of them were mine. Kids who got into trouble as well as easy child's who excelled. There was only one kid I ever recall that was banned from the house and that my kids were warned to avoid. He was so severely mentally disturbed that he was seriously dangerous. I explained to them why he should be avoided and why he was banned. If the danger factor had not been there.....it would have been different. But that kid is a serial killer in the making if not already.......I wish I was kidding......but sadly I'm not. I have the education/experience in which to base that judgement, I don't do so lightly and they knew it. </p><p></p><p>Some parents had issues. I didn't worry about it. That was between them and their child. Evidently they eventually got over it because the children would continue to come over. There was always adult supervision in this house. Always. So maybe that is why. </p><p></p><p>As far as losing your temper and venting.........it's normal, don't worry about it. At least you have a safe place to do so. </p><p></p><p>Hugs</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 620823, member: 84"] Nancy I understand your anger and frustration at Angel's immature behavior. However, in a weird way.......I see her point of view too. It can't be easy knowing that your sibs and family suffer consequences for your actions/diagnosis. It isn't fair. It isn't right. And it seems given her response......that perhaps Angel is harboring some anger herself over it. I can't say I blame her much. Perhaps because I had similar experiences for different reasons. That said, the friend is 18 yrs old. She is an adult who can decide whom she picks for friends, regardless of her parents approval. If there are consequences to those choices, then she should be prepared to face them. She knew the risk of breaking the rules. Sadly, most parents today seem to swing from one extreme to another instead of finding a middle ground with their kids. The teen years should be a time when you are teaching your children to think and act independently from yourself while they are still protected by their parents. I've never been one to even attempt to choose my children's friends. In that respect, you're just shooting yourself in the foot. Kids will friend whomever they choose regardless of rules and consequences. At best you're just encouraging them to lie to you and to sneak around, which is not good. Once my kids were 18 they were treated like adults. Well, they were to to varying degrees throughout the teen years. The only thing was they had to follow house rules. But outside of that they had complete freedom. My home was filled with difficult children while my kids were growing up. Most certainly not all of them were mine. Kids who got into trouble as well as easy child's who excelled. There was only one kid I ever recall that was banned from the house and that my kids were warned to avoid. He was so severely mentally disturbed that he was seriously dangerous. I explained to them why he should be avoided and why he was banned. If the danger factor had not been there.....it would have been different. But that kid is a serial killer in the making if not already.......I wish I was kidding......but sadly I'm not. I have the education/experience in which to base that judgement, I don't do so lightly and they knew it. Some parents had issues. I didn't worry about it. That was between them and their child. Evidently they eventually got over it because the children would continue to come over. There was always adult supervision in this house. Always. So maybe that is why. As far as losing your temper and venting.........it's normal, don't worry about it. At least you have a safe place to do so. Hugs [/QUOTE]
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