As you all know, difficult child is back at home while participating in a nine-month DBT program. She has found another job working as a hair stylist assistant in a very upscale salon close to our house. They told her that they are willing to train her from the bottom up to refresh her skills and renew her license. They are also teaching her how to spray tan and do facials. So this is a great opportunity for difficult child.
We've had some ups and downs including some slips with drinking. She has agreed to take Antabuse while she is here so that she can let her brain heal by staying sober and benefit from the DBT.
We did have a scare yesterday when she developed hives/rash all over her body. Since she is taking a lot of medications right now I wasn't sure which one caused it but got scared that it was a Lamictal rash. I was ready to take her to the hospital last night but the rash started disappearing and was gone by this morning. All of the medications she is on (Cipro and a steroid for bronchitis, celexa, lamictal, and Visteril, and Antabuse) listed a rash as a possible severe side effect. Of course, the doctors are all off for the weekend so I am going to watch closely to see if the rash comes back and take her to an urgent care center if it does. She said that the rash was not painful or itchy. I guess it could also have even been a reaction to a chemical at the salon.
But my real question is what do we do with difficult child when we leave for our week long vacation in Mexico at the end of the month. Last year when we let her stay home while we went to Hawaii was a disaster. She went on a weeklong drinking binge and kept calling us drunk. She managed to run up a $250 water bill for that week (we still don't know how) and doubled our electric bill by keeping the temperature down to 68 degrees (in July!). A basement window was also smashed and she claimed someone tried to break in our house.
Needless to say, we don't feel comfortable leaving her here alone. We told her to find someone to stay with but the loser boyfriend lives with his parents who won't let her stay for the week (an occasional night is okay with them). None of her other "friends" will let her stay either. None of my friends have volunteered but I can't say that I blame them and we have no family in town.
We told her that she would have to go to an extended stay hotel. However, the addiction counselor that husband and I have started seeing doesn't think that will be a good idea. She said the fact that we are leaving on difficult child's birthday (birthdays are a big trigger) and that she has anxiety and abandonment issues makes staying in a hotel alone problematic. She even mentioned cancelling our trip as one possibility. She didn't say we should . . . just that was an option. husband will be devasted if we do. We've had a hard year and have been really looking at getting away with friends.
I thought of trying to find a housesitter but I am not sure how to explain a 27-year-old difficult child to the housesitter.
Any suggestions?
~Kathy
We've had some ups and downs including some slips with drinking. She has agreed to take Antabuse while she is here so that she can let her brain heal by staying sober and benefit from the DBT.
We did have a scare yesterday when she developed hives/rash all over her body. Since she is taking a lot of medications right now I wasn't sure which one caused it but got scared that it was a Lamictal rash. I was ready to take her to the hospital last night but the rash started disappearing and was gone by this morning. All of the medications she is on (Cipro and a steroid for bronchitis, celexa, lamictal, and Visteril, and Antabuse) listed a rash as a possible severe side effect. Of course, the doctors are all off for the weekend so I am going to watch closely to see if the rash comes back and take her to an urgent care center if it does. She said that the rash was not painful or itchy. I guess it could also have even been a reaction to a chemical at the salon.
But my real question is what do we do with difficult child when we leave for our week long vacation in Mexico at the end of the month. Last year when we let her stay home while we went to Hawaii was a disaster. She went on a weeklong drinking binge and kept calling us drunk. She managed to run up a $250 water bill for that week (we still don't know how) and doubled our electric bill by keeping the temperature down to 68 degrees (in July!). A basement window was also smashed and she claimed someone tried to break in our house.
Needless to say, we don't feel comfortable leaving her here alone. We told her to find someone to stay with but the loser boyfriend lives with his parents who won't let her stay for the week (an occasional night is okay with them). None of her other "friends" will let her stay either. None of my friends have volunteered but I can't say that I blame them and we have no family in town.
We told her that she would have to go to an extended stay hotel. However, the addiction counselor that husband and I have started seeing doesn't think that will be a good idea. She said the fact that we are leaving on difficult child's birthday (birthdays are a big trigger) and that she has anxiety and abandonment issues makes staying in a hotel alone problematic. She even mentioned cancelling our trip as one possibility. She didn't say we should . . . just that was an option. husband will be devasted if we do. We've had a hard year and have been really looking at getting away with friends.
I thought of trying to find a housesitter but I am not sure how to explain a 27-year-old difficult child to the housesitter.
Any suggestions?
~Kathy