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What to tell the other child
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<blockquote data-quote="aeroeng" data-source="post: 325763" data-attributes="member: 6557"><p>ODD is not a real helpful diagnoses as it is very general. Hopeful y as you progress you will get a more detailed prognosis. </p><p> </p><p> One problem with difficult children is the effect on a younger sibling. My difficult child would absolutely destroy his brother. Which hurt all the more because of the idolizing. I referred to the younger one as "difficult child in training" because he learned a lot from difficult child. When this happens my proper response is to become very angry and hit the wall. Strategies we used include:</p><p> </p><p> - Separate them as frequently as possible. (Use, any before and after school activities available, have difficult child in training say at a neighbor's house, anything to keep them apart)</p><p> - Take difficult child to his own counselor to talk about his feelings and frustration. Counselor used a lot of "play therapy" and that worked well for him. </p><p> - Talk to difficult child in training frequently so that he understands what is going on. And that no difficult child's behavior is not appropriate. No special word to use. Just state it straight forward just like what you wrote in your posting. Those words work, kids are smart.</p><p> - Recognize him for the extra effort he must put into be difficult child's brother.</p><p> - Tag team with husband. I take difficult child, he takes difficult child in training. Then switch. When a lone with difficult child in training make sure he gets a lot of attention. (Which means we forget cleaning the house, fixing things, socializing with friends, no time for a real life).</p><p> </p><p> Good luck</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="aeroeng, post: 325763, member: 6557"] ODD is not a real helpful diagnoses as it is very general. Hopeful y as you progress you will get a more detailed prognosis. One problem with difficult children is the effect on a younger sibling. My difficult child would absolutely destroy his brother. Which hurt all the more because of the idolizing. I referred to the younger one as "difficult child in training" because he learned a lot from difficult child. When this happens my proper response is to become very angry and hit the wall. Strategies we used include: - Separate them as frequently as possible. (Use, any before and after school activities available, have difficult child in training say at a neighbor's house, anything to keep them apart) - Take difficult child to his own counselor to talk about his feelings and frustration. Counselor used a lot of "play therapy" and that worked well for him. - Talk to difficult child in training frequently so that he understands what is going on. And that no difficult child's behavior is not appropriate. No special word to use. Just state it straight forward just like what you wrote in your posting. Those words work, kids are smart. - Recognize him for the extra effort he must put into be difficult child's brother. - Tag team with husband. I take difficult child, he takes difficult child in training. Then switch. When a lone with difficult child in training make sure he gets a lot of attention. (Which means we forget cleaning the house, fixing things, socializing with friends, no time for a real life). Good luck [/QUOTE]
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