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What would you do differently? mini vent
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<blockquote data-quote="trinityroyal" data-source="post: 278882" data-attributes="member: 3907"><p>Star, I can't tell you how many times this exact thing has been my downfall.</p><p>difficult child shows significant improvement, starts respecting boundaries, behaving himself, being respectful...So I decide to cut the boy some slack and ease up a little bit on the strictness. And then, <strong>BOOM</strong>. Straight to he// in the proverbial handbasket.</p><p></p><p>I realized after a while that difficult child is binary, like a computer. It's either 1 or 0, on or off. If a rule is not 100% on, then it's 100% off. I do my boy no favours by trying to impose 80% of a rule, or only in this context or that context, or whatever. Strictness is probably the best thing for him, because he has Clear. Unequivocal. Rules. And that's exactly what he needs to get along in the world.</p><p></p><p>I am glad to hear that you and DF have been able to talk things through, redraw your boundaries and set your limits. I think you'll both be healthier for it, and I think Dude will be as well. He's learning, but he still has a long road to travel.</p><p></p><p>Sending you many hugs, my friend.</p><p>Trinity</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="trinityroyal, post: 278882, member: 3907"] Star, I can't tell you how many times this exact thing has been my downfall. difficult child shows significant improvement, starts respecting boundaries, behaving himself, being respectful...So I decide to cut the boy some slack and ease up a little bit on the strictness. And then, [B]BOOM[/B]. Straight to he// in the proverbial handbasket. I realized after a while that difficult child is binary, like a computer. It's either 1 or 0, on or off. If a rule is not 100% on, then it's 100% off. I do my boy no favours by trying to impose 80% of a rule, or only in this context or that context, or whatever. Strictness is probably the best thing for him, because he has Clear. Unequivocal. Rules. And that's exactly what he needs to get along in the world. I am glad to hear that you and DF have been able to talk things through, redraw your boundaries and set your limits. I think you'll both be healthier for it, and I think Dude will be as well. He's learning, but he still has a long road to travel. Sending you many hugs, my friend. Trinity [/QUOTE]
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