gizbywife
New Member
Hi. I am going through the roof with my difficult child's situation. He's 13 and we don't know what to do or where to go next.
He is currently in an alternative education (partial) program offered by an area school district where he is doing "all right" but still having bouts of depression, lying, stealing, etc. etc. ad nauseum. Since October we have experienced the following:
My questions for you all:
- How long before we start to consider out of home placement?
- How do we save our marriage - the stress is phenomenal!
- Should I quit my part time job to focus on him? I stayed home until he was 10.
- How does one afford out of home placement? How do you find a good place?
- If we decide to go the Residential Treatment Facility (RTF) route, how do we explain to friends and family where he is?
- How do we deal with PPs who we seemed to be surrounded by and who all have FABULOUS advice!
OK, that's a start. If this was the wrong place to put this, please let me know. I am getting desperate.
Thanks!
- How do we keep our 2 easy child from hating difficult child and blaming him for everything?
-
He is currently in an alternative education (partial) program offered by an area school district where he is doing "all right" but still having bouts of depression, lying, stealing, etc. etc. ad nauseum. Since October we have experienced the following:
- 2 physical fights resulting in In School Suspensions
- 3 instances of stealing - cell phone, money, jewelry
(the police were involved in 2 of the instances, so he is in a first offenders' program and needs to do 10 hours of community service a month as well as check in weekly with a pseudo-parole officer which I have to fight with him to get him to do) - Nightly screaming matches = him screaming at us. Us not knowing what to do and trying desperately to stay calm.
- 1 report made to Children & Youth services (by difficult child who was angry we wouldn't take him to a movie at 9 pm on a Sunday night) resulting in our being investigated for child abuse - found to be unsubstantiated and dismissed
- 2 reports of unwanted physical contact with a girl
- Assignment of a TSS who was removed after he threatened her
- Refusal to do homework
- Refusal to participate in family outings, then crying and screaming that we don't want to ever do anything with him.
- Several threats of suicide (mostly to get out of trouble, as indicated to us by therapists and crisis counselors)
- Medication Merry-go-round
My questions for you all:
- How long before we start to consider out of home placement?
- How do we save our marriage - the stress is phenomenal!
- Should I quit my part time job to focus on him? I stayed home until he was 10.
- How does one afford out of home placement? How do you find a good place?
- If we decide to go the Residential Treatment Facility (RTF) route, how do we explain to friends and family where he is?
- How do we deal with PPs who we seemed to be surrounded by and who all have FABULOUS advice!
OK, that's a start. If this was the wrong place to put this, please let me know. I am getting desperate.
Thanks!
- How do we keep our 2 easy child from hating difficult child and blaming him for everything?
-