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why can't i medicate? help!
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<blockquote data-quote="Jena" data-source="post: 205440" data-attributes="member: 4514"><p>good morning,</p><p></p><p>Thanks for the responses and getting me past the wall of cr*p i'm in. I think I've just been beat down too much by my ex, my family, the school recently and I step cautiously with every move i make. boyfriend said to me last night it's also because the dr. looks to me for answers, it should be the other way around. So, I feel so highly responsible and also not educated enough to make big decisions like this. Seriously this guy is nothiing but a prescription pad to me.</p><p></p><p>I look to him for guidance someone to finally take control and he anti's up thorazine. ugh.</p><p></p><p>andy - in regards to the BiPolar (BP), dr's have felt that due to the fact that without anything for sleep difficult child can go into modes where she'd literally be up all night or until 2 or 3 yet be up and be creative, focused, etc. yet now that i have combatted the sleep issue i don't see the swings as much as I did before. I think BiPolar (BP) takes a long time to properly diagnose with a kid, you have to monitor them for a while, therapy, medications if you need than you can see what's what. difficult child has always been a complicated case because besides the anxiety which is always prevelent. </p><p></p><p>sharon - regarding me, that's a loaded question. i find it as well as of late as do others i'm all over the place. my t feels it is due to my own anxiety. i've been through alot this past year, too much. so my heads barely above water at certain points, yet i am very good with difficult child and patient. if you have read some of my posts you know the personal stuff i've been up against, much more than my personal relationship yet my family disowning me last year, than walking away from my job (yup my choice, yet still strange after working all my life to have someone supporting me, especially my trust issues), than bang in the middle of difficult child issues and job, boom out comes supressed memories of an extremely abusive past with my father. than followed my own diagnosis of complex ptsd, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) (obsessional thinking) and slight adhd. so, it has been a rough road i will not lie in regards to keeping me sane. my doctor and i have discussed BiPolar (BP). i actually asked her if it was a possibility she did a evaluation. asked certain questions, etc. at the end she said no jen it's not that , your just under an enormous amt of stress and it's been going on now for quite some years. it wasn't just this year. before this year i was calm and centered and focused. now i'm not. we have discussed medications for me i do not want to go there yet. i want to keep pushing forward without. when i feel as though i can't manage me anymore i will take them. yet i'm not there yet. i meet the needs of difficult child and older one, my relationship, my family with whom i'm repairing a relationship with, the small business i created and also looking for new work. so i have all the balls in the air. boyfriend actually planted me last night in regards to the medications. we had a long talk and than i got ok with it. i just have such fear surrounding it. </p><p></p><p>in regards to the post i did about my idea, it isn't as far fetched as you thought. maybe you misunderstood my intention, yet helping people with information pertaining to forms, filling them out for them, being an advocate of some type would be a great idea. sort of like a go between the lawyers and the courts. yet it would take alot of money to insure myself, open the llc, and just effort on my part that i do not want to go through at this time. i do not like to see people wronged, taken advantage of it upsets me and i've seen it for years. </p><p></p><p>Back to the school issue, I also get alot of mixed info from school. this new teacher is so gun ho on fixing difficult child which i do appreciate yet i need information just that not her opinion or her perception of what difficult child is going through she isn't qualified i just want straight talk, yet from her i do not get that. so i'm truly out of the loop in regards to what is going on daily in that school. she seems to have created an out for herself to avoid the social issue of recess the student council works on projects in the lunchroom during recess so she signed up all by herself to get out of the awkwardness of that situation.</p><p></p><p>difficult child is also manipulating, extremely needy, and plays me quite often. so i'm always careful not to feed too much into what she says, because i almost always have to figure out if it's due to her overall needines and just wanting negative attention or if its truth of what she's experiencing.</p><p></p><p>ok enough said lol.</p><p></p><p>oops one more thing, lol but anyway i do see your point Sharon, I truly do. why, let me ask you i know your not a dr. and neither am i but the jumping all over i've been told can be the anxiety mixed with the adhd i've got going on. what does it strike you as out of the box reading my posts? i'd be curious to know and pls. don't hold back <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Jena, post: 205440, member: 4514"] good morning, Thanks for the responses and getting me past the wall of cr*p i'm in. I think I've just been beat down too much by my ex, my family, the school recently and I step cautiously with every move i make. boyfriend said to me last night it's also because the dr. looks to me for answers, it should be the other way around. So, I feel so highly responsible and also not educated enough to make big decisions like this. Seriously this guy is nothiing but a prescription pad to me. I look to him for guidance someone to finally take control and he anti's up thorazine. ugh. andy - in regards to the BiPolar (BP), dr's have felt that due to the fact that without anything for sleep difficult child can go into modes where she'd literally be up all night or until 2 or 3 yet be up and be creative, focused, etc. yet now that i have combatted the sleep issue i don't see the swings as much as I did before. I think BiPolar (BP) takes a long time to properly diagnose with a kid, you have to monitor them for a while, therapy, medications if you need than you can see what's what. difficult child has always been a complicated case because besides the anxiety which is always prevelent. sharon - regarding me, that's a loaded question. i find it as well as of late as do others i'm all over the place. my t feels it is due to my own anxiety. i've been through alot this past year, too much. so my heads barely above water at certain points, yet i am very good with difficult child and patient. if you have read some of my posts you know the personal stuff i've been up against, much more than my personal relationship yet my family disowning me last year, than walking away from my job (yup my choice, yet still strange after working all my life to have someone supporting me, especially my trust issues), than bang in the middle of difficult child issues and job, boom out comes supressed memories of an extremely abusive past with my father. than followed my own diagnosis of complex ptsd, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) (obsessional thinking) and slight adhd. so, it has been a rough road i will not lie in regards to keeping me sane. my doctor and i have discussed BiPolar (BP). i actually asked her if it was a possibility she did a evaluation. asked certain questions, etc. at the end she said no jen it's not that , your just under an enormous amt of stress and it's been going on now for quite some years. it wasn't just this year. before this year i was calm and centered and focused. now i'm not. we have discussed medications for me i do not want to go there yet. i want to keep pushing forward without. when i feel as though i can't manage me anymore i will take them. yet i'm not there yet. i meet the needs of difficult child and older one, my relationship, my family with whom i'm repairing a relationship with, the small business i created and also looking for new work. so i have all the balls in the air. boyfriend actually planted me last night in regards to the medications. we had a long talk and than i got ok with it. i just have such fear surrounding it. in regards to the post i did about my idea, it isn't as far fetched as you thought. maybe you misunderstood my intention, yet helping people with information pertaining to forms, filling them out for them, being an advocate of some type would be a great idea. sort of like a go between the lawyers and the courts. yet it would take alot of money to insure myself, open the llc, and just effort on my part that i do not want to go through at this time. i do not like to see people wronged, taken advantage of it upsets me and i've seen it for years. Back to the school issue, I also get alot of mixed info from school. this new teacher is so gun ho on fixing difficult child which i do appreciate yet i need information just that not her opinion or her perception of what difficult child is going through she isn't qualified i just want straight talk, yet from her i do not get that. so i'm truly out of the loop in regards to what is going on daily in that school. she seems to have created an out for herself to avoid the social issue of recess the student council works on projects in the lunchroom during recess so she signed up all by herself to get out of the awkwardness of that situation. difficult child is also manipulating, extremely needy, and plays me quite often. so i'm always careful not to feed too much into what she says, because i almost always have to figure out if it's due to her overall needines and just wanting negative attention or if its truth of what she's experiencing. ok enough said lol. oops one more thing, lol but anyway i do see your point Sharon, I truly do. why, let me ask you i know your not a dr. and neither am i but the jumping all over i've been told can be the anxiety mixed with the adhd i've got going on. what does it strike you as out of the box reading my posts? i'd be curious to know and pls. don't hold back :) [/QUOTE]
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