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WOW! A TOTAL Refusal of Boundaries!
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<blockquote data-quote="flutterby" data-source="post: 395353" data-attributes="member: 7083"><p>Susie, I'm so sorry. Your mother is a piece of work.</p><p></p><p>I don't think I would play her game anymore. I agree with Katya (thank you for sharing, Katya). No amount of talking is going to change a thing. Withdrawing from her speaks volumes, however.</p><p></p><p>My mom does the favorites thing, too. It's been a big issue of late - too long and too tired to go into it. But, I understand. My daughter is hurt by it and doesn't understand and I do my best to explain something that I don't really understand myself. I know from past experience that talking doesn't change a thing. It's only been when I pull back that she seems to get it. If you're comfortable enough with your in-laws, I would talk to them about your mother calling them; let them know you are aware and are sorry that she involved them, then suggest that they might want to tell your mother (should she do this again) that she should be discussing this with you, not them. </p><p></p><p>I have to wonder, though, if your mom has a need to be needed. GFGbro obviously "needs" her. You don't. Maybe she's threatened by that. Doesn't excuse her behavior in the slightest. Just thinking out loud.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="flutterby, post: 395353, member: 7083"] Susie, I'm so sorry. Your mother is a piece of work. I don't think I would play her game anymore. I agree with Katya (thank you for sharing, Katya). No amount of talking is going to change a thing. Withdrawing from her speaks volumes, however. My mom does the favorites thing, too. It's been a big issue of late - too long and too tired to go into it. But, I understand. My daughter is hurt by it and doesn't understand and I do my best to explain something that I don't really understand myself. I know from past experience that talking doesn't change a thing. It's only been when I pull back that she seems to get it. If you're comfortable enough with your in-laws, I would talk to them about your mother calling them; let them know you are aware and are sorry that she involved them, then suggest that they might want to tell your mother (should she do this again) that she should be discussing this with you, not them. I have to wonder, though, if your mom has a need to be needed. GFGbro obviously "needs" her. You don't. Maybe she's threatened by that. Doesn't excuse her behavior in the slightest. Just thinking out loud. [/QUOTE]
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WOW! A TOTAL Refusal of Boundaries!
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