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Wow. Indirectly heard from N's birthmom!
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<blockquote data-quote="C.J." data-source="post: 233143" data-attributes="member: 1987"><p>Ladies, </p><p></p><p>Thank you. N* will be meeting with a social worker next week to talk about open adoption for the baby she's carrying now. </p><p></p><p>We met with a different one a few days after she told me she was pregnant, when the first words out of her mouth were, "I think it would be best for the baby if I put it up for adoption." This social worker said after thirty years of doing this, the only way she will now do private adoptions is with some sort of open adoption arrangement. There are fewer problems with the adopted children later. Unfortunatley, the meeting with the first social worker did not go well, as I think N* thought open adoption would allow her full visitation rights - including overnight visits, (Egads!), rather than the more close to reality open adoption which would allow her to choose the parents, and in turn they would provide her with letters, pictures, and an occasional visit to the adoptive family's home. N* wasn't listening and wanted to hear what she wanted to hear.</p><p></p><p>Her OB/GYN gave her the referral to the social worker we will meet next week.</p><p></p><p>I now have a few more questions to put on my list. I've been trying to be sensitive to the fact that if N* goes through with an adoption, she will grieve, which would be understandable. I've also been trying to have her put herself in her own little girl shoes, and be sensitive to what her baby will also want - a stable home with two committed loving parents....</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="C.J., post: 233143, member: 1987"] Ladies, Thank you. N* will be meeting with a social worker next week to talk about open adoption for the baby she's carrying now. We met with a different one a few days after she told me she was pregnant, when the first words out of her mouth were, "I think it would be best for the baby if I put it up for adoption." This social worker said after thirty years of doing this, the only way she will now do private adoptions is with some sort of open adoption arrangement. There are fewer problems with the adopted children later. Unfortunatley, the meeting with the first social worker did not go well, as I think N* thought open adoption would allow her full visitation rights - including overnight visits, (Egads!), rather than the more close to reality open adoption which would allow her to choose the parents, and in turn they would provide her with letters, pictures, and an occasional visit to the adoptive family's home. N* wasn't listening and wanted to hear what she wanted to hear. Her OB/GYN gave her the referral to the social worker we will meet next week. I now have a few more questions to put on my list. I've been trying to be sensitive to the fact that if N* goes through with an adoption, she will grieve, which would be understandable. I've also been trying to have her put herself in her own little girl shoes, and be sensitive to what her baby will also want - a stable home with two committed loving parents.... [/QUOTE]
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Wow. Indirectly heard from N's birthmom!
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