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Parent Emeritus
Wow...this morning was UNREAL
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<blockquote data-quote="Fran" data-source="post: 249036" data-attributes="member: 3"><p>Nomad, I'm so sorry for your kitty and difficult child. It's understandable that she is hysterical. It was a really traumatic, violent scene that unfolded.</p><p>Do you believe she didn't know the kitty was following her? My difficult child probably would think it was ok for the pet to follow him. </p><p>It was dark and the driver may not have seen the kitty especially since it jumped suddenly. </p><p>Our kids are about 80 to 90% able to take care of a pet but that 10 to 20% has to be taught, reinforced and supervised. My difficult child feeds, walks the dogs when I am out of town but really doesn't think of them for hours at a time. When the routine is changed he doesn't make the accomadations. If it rains he doesn't think to let them out. Obviously they have an accident. If he has to take them to the groomer, then he doesn't give HoneySue her medications. They have the capacity but not entirely. </p><p></p><p>She should be able to grieve for a bit. They feel pain and anguish and horror at their loss. Maybe even a little guilt slips in there(on their level). </p><p>No lessons now. In a month or so you can bring up the danger of walking anywhere alone in the dark. I would approach the issue of care of a pet gradually. Remind her of all the good things she did for kitty and all the things she did right. Ask her what she would do differently if she ever has a cat again. Start it out as a gradual learning lesson. She may be able to talk about it more clearly after the trauma and emotions die down a bit. </p><p></p><p>Poor kid. Poor kitty.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Fran, post: 249036, member: 3"] Nomad, I'm so sorry for your kitty and difficult child. It's understandable that she is hysterical. It was a really traumatic, violent scene that unfolded. Do you believe she didn't know the kitty was following her? My difficult child probably would think it was ok for the pet to follow him. It was dark and the driver may not have seen the kitty especially since it jumped suddenly. Our kids are about 80 to 90% able to take care of a pet but that 10 to 20% has to be taught, reinforced and supervised. My difficult child feeds, walks the dogs when I am out of town but really doesn't think of them for hours at a time. When the routine is changed he doesn't make the accomadations. If it rains he doesn't think to let them out. Obviously they have an accident. If he has to take them to the groomer, then he doesn't give HoneySue her medications. They have the capacity but not entirely. She should be able to grieve for a bit. They feel pain and anguish and horror at their loss. Maybe even a little guilt slips in there(on their level). No lessons now. In a month or so you can bring up the danger of walking anywhere alone in the dark. I would approach the issue of care of a pet gradually. Remind her of all the good things she did for kitty and all the things she did right. Ask her what she would do differently if she ever has a cat again. Start it out as a gradual learning lesson. She may be able to talk about it more clearly after the trauma and emotions die down a bit. Poor kid. Poor kitty. [/QUOTE]
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Wow...this morning was UNREAL
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