Malika
Well-Known Member
After setting out by car on the 22nd July, we yesterday arrived in Marrakesh, via 4 days in Spain with my ex-sister in law and overnight stays in hotels and with a friend who lives in Casablanca. Long days in the car (with J asking every five minutes "are we nearly there?"). In Spain, J was so happy to see and play with his four year old cousin but things did not go particularly well... He played outside with the local kids and got increasingly excited and uncontrollable, tearing an electric cable off a wall, soaking himself and others in the local fountain, behaving disrespectfully/mockingly to me and other adults... In Casa with my friend it was even worse (yes, he was tired), manically touching things, getting things out of boxes and drawers, shouting at me and saying things like "Are you stupid?" when I scolded him, and also extremely easily upset, crying and tantruming at the slightest thing. He was also quite provocative and rude to my friend. My friend was gracious and understanding but I did, yes, feel embarrassed and helpless to explain. Other than that, he had a great time on the beaches we stopped at on the way down, jumping fearlessly into huge waves and swimming in pools. This morning my ex-husband came to collect him and he has gone off to stay with the assembled family for three weeks. He was SO excited to see Daddy and said goodbye to me without a backward glance... I hope he does have fun and things go okay with him. I find this behaviour in social situations so difficult, for all concerned... My ex sister in law kept saying "It will get better in time, you'll see, he'll calm down" but I don't have such optimism.
Our relationship gets affected, I find myself disliking the behaviour so much, I get stressed and annoyed, he knows that of course and gets even more difficult. The times I managed not to get upset when he was acting up and out but spoke to him kindly and gently, he looked grateful, responded. I KNOW it's not his fault, lagging skills but really it's impossible to operate in our world as it is without those skills.
Our relationship gets affected, I find myself disliking the behaviour so much, I get stressed and annoyed, he knows that of course and gets even more difficult. The times I managed not to get upset when he was acting up and out but spoke to him kindly and gently, he looked grateful, responded. I KNOW it's not his fault, lagging skills but really it's impossible to operate in our world as it is without those skills.