Shari
IsItFridayYet?
Let's say, for the sake of argument, that you are an avid baseball fan. You are a baseball NUT.
You go to a game once a week, at least. You have game balls that you've caught. You have autographed balls, bats, and gloves. You coach your kid's litle league teams. You eat, sleep, and breathe baseball.
You display your prized baseball "stuff" in a giant glass case in your living room. Your difficult child has never broken the case. Your difficult child uses his own baseball things to play baseball and admires your baseball stuff, but despite all his problems, he's never been inappropriate with the baseball stuff.
Then one day difficult child gets angry at you while you're driving in the car. He says he's gonna hit you with a baseball bat when you get home. He doesn't have a bat in the car. Home is a hald hour away. By the time you get home, of course, it never happens, but he still said it.
So you go home and hide all the baseball bats, because you're scared. difficult child feels terrible. He apologizes to everyone repeatedly.
Months pass. difficult child frequently looks at the empty display case and comments about the baseball stuff being gone, because he might use it to hurt someone. He says this frequently.
At this point, is keeping the baseball stuff gone still a good idea? Or is it reinforcing to him the exact idea you're trying to keep out of his head? (because when it was there, he was NEVER inappropriate with it; but now that its gone, he frequently is reminded that he can hurt you with it...?)
You go to a game once a week, at least. You have game balls that you've caught. You have autographed balls, bats, and gloves. You coach your kid's litle league teams. You eat, sleep, and breathe baseball.
You display your prized baseball "stuff" in a giant glass case in your living room. Your difficult child has never broken the case. Your difficult child uses his own baseball things to play baseball and admires your baseball stuff, but despite all his problems, he's never been inappropriate with the baseball stuff.
Then one day difficult child gets angry at you while you're driving in the car. He says he's gonna hit you with a baseball bat when you get home. He doesn't have a bat in the car. Home is a hald hour away. By the time you get home, of course, it never happens, but he still said it.
So you go home and hide all the baseball bats, because you're scared. difficult child feels terrible. He apologizes to everyone repeatedly.
Months pass. difficult child frequently looks at the empty display case and comments about the baseball stuff being gone, because he might use it to hurt someone. He says this frequently.
At this point, is keeping the baseball stuff gone still a good idea? Or is it reinforcing to him the exact idea you're trying to keep out of his head? (because when it was there, he was NEVER inappropriate with it; but now that its gone, he frequently is reminded that he can hurt you with it...?)