"Abusive Nagging" - A Public Service Report from difficult child

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by DaisyFace, Nov 9, 2010.

  1. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    For an English project, difficult child decided to tackle the subject of "Parental Nagging". Her report details that abusive, parental nagging is responsible for poor grades amongst high school student's AND a 30% dropout rate amongst college students.

    Wow! Who knew???

    difficult child's advice to parents is this:

    1) Parents need to understand that once a person reaches age 14, they are no longer a child, they are an adult.

    2) Just because these teenaged adults choose to live at home in no way gives parents the right to tell them what to do.

    3) These teens require their parents financial support - BUT do not need to hear any parental opinions about how they spend the money.

    4) Teens do best if their parents leave them completely alone - except, of course, if the teen needs something.


    And how did difficult child do the research for this report?

    Evidently, she herself is a victim of severe, abusive nagging at the hands of her parents!

    Gosh, I feel just horrible! CPS will be stopping by at any moment, I'm sure...

    (I can't wait to hear what the English teacher thinks of this report! Of course, she may be the one who "turns us in". LOL!)
  2. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    :tongue: Wow...Hahahaha, thank your difficult child for the Big Belly Laughs!!!! Your poor difficult child....I feel soooOooooOooo bad for her!
  3. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    LMAO - guilty as charged here!!
  4. wmh4bama

    wmh4bama Guest

    I needed that chuckle today! :laughing:
  5. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Ohhhh I feel SOOOOO SORRY for the kids who are "abusively nagged"!!!

    Adults? Who cannot vote, drive a car, drink, smoke, or even join the military?

    HAHAHAHAHA I bet Onyxx would love this...
  6. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    O yes! Let's have a fundraiser!

    Onyxx and difficult child can be the "poster children"...er "adults"...
  7. whatamess

    whatamess New Member

    Totally funny! I think many teens could rally around those suggestions!
  8. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

    OMG This one you need to save and tuck away for when she has her own teens. muahhaahhhaaahhaa

    Too cute, too funny, and I bet she has the teacher in stitches even if she doesn't get a passing grade. lol
  9. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Holy cripes - are you serious????

    You HAVE to tell us what her teacher writes on this paper.

    RESEARCH?!?!?! She is killin' me!
  10. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh yeah, you should change the diagnosis on your signature: Parental Nagging Syndrome
  11. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    That's what I was going to suggest - the best revenge is to keep a copy, and then when she has her own teens, hand it to the teen. Then sit back and wait for the fireworks...

  12. shellyd67

    shellyd67 Active Member

    This is definetly one report you need to save .... I am soooooo curious to see what her teacher says .... LMAO !
  13. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    OMG!! I really want to know what that teacher says about this report. Is she serious? Is she really turning this in?

  14. Jena

    Jena New Member

    lol that is way way too funny
  15. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    Priceless. Can't wait to see how it goes over! Long as the teacher has a sense of humor I wouldn't be surprised if she gets an A. Def save for when there's grandkids.
  16. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Rofl! I agree to keep it for when she has teens!!
  17. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I think I would have this waiting for her at breakfast:

    A Child's Bill of Rights (the funny version)

    My son came home from school one day,
    with a silly grin on his face,
    He thought he was smarter than me, his mom,
    and he could put me in my place.

    HE SAID:
    Guess what I learned in Civics Two,
    that's taught by Mr. Wright,
    It's about the laws of the land, today,
    its called the Children's Bill of Rights.

    IT SAYS:
    That I don't have to clean my room,
    I don't even have to cut my hair,
    Nobody can tell me what I can eat,
    or choose the clothes I wear.

    IT SAID:
    Freedom of speech is my constitutional guarantee,
    and its my choice of what I read, or what I watch on T.V.
    I have the freedom of religion, and regardless to what you say,
    I don't have to ask your God for help---I don't have to pray.

    IT SAID:
    I can wear an earring in my ear,
    and if I want to--I can pierce my nose,
    It's my choice if I so desire,
    to tattoo Satan's numbers--across my toes.

    Hey, if ever again you try to spank me,
    I will charge you with the crime,
    and I can back up all my charges,
    With the marks on my behind.

    Don't ever touch my body again,
    this body of mine is for me to use,
    And not for your hugs and kisses and stuff,
    that's just another form of child abuse.

    And stop trying to fill my head with morals,
    like your mama did to you,
    Things like that is called mind control,
    And that's illegal too!

    Mom, I have these children's rights,
    you can't do a thing to me,
    I can call the children's services,
    better known as C. S. D.

    MY TURN!!!!
    My very first impression was,
    to toss this boy right out the door,
    But here was a chance to teach him a lesson,
    for once and for ever more.

    I took my time and mulled it over,
    but something like this I couldn't let go,
    This kid of mine didn't realize,
    that he was messing with a pro!

    The next day we went shopping,
    very much to his dismay,
    I didn't buy him 501s
    or shirts designed by Nike.

    I had called and talked to the C. S. D.,
    they said that they didn't really care,
    If I bought him Volume shoes,
    or a pair of Nike Airs.

    I canceled his appointment with DMV,
    so he could test his driving skills,
    I'd probably be dead by now for sure,
    If only looks could kill!

    I SAID:
    By-the-way, I don't have time to stop and eat,
    or pick up stuff for you to munch,
    I think you should follow C. S. D.'s advice,
    And make yourself a big sack lunch.

    So, you say what? That you're not hungry,
    that you can wait until dinner time?
    Well, I am fixing liver and onions,
    Cause that a favorite dish of mine.

    Can we stop to get a movie,
    so you can watch on the VCR?
    Gosh no! I sold what was your T.V.,
    And bought four new tires for my car.

    I also rented out your room,
    sorry, you really don't need a bed,
    All I really have to do for you,
    Is put a roof over your head.

    As long as I have to buy your clothes,
    and the food that you must eat,
    The money I gave you for an allowance,
    Is going to buy me something neat.

    No more eating after we shop,
    no more joking along the way,
    Son, I too have Bill of Rights
    That goes into effect today.

    What's the matter, why are you crying?
    What are you doing down on your knees?
    Why are you asking God to help you,
    Instead of C. S. D.?

  18. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I'd love to see a copy of that paper...I'll bet it's a riot!
  19. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    I love difficult child's essay and Janet's poem :)
  20. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Pretty sure that's the most awesome report I have ever heard about.

    Now I am anxiously awaiting the returned/graded paper!