SearchingForRainbows
Active Member
!!! THANKS FOR SHARING!!! SFRP.S. Janet, I love your poem too!!! I think I should wallpaper difficult child 3(?)/easy child(?)'s room in it, lol...!!!
"Abusive Nagging" - A Public Service Report from difficult child
- Thread starter DaisyFace
- Start date
!!! THANKS FOR SHARING!!! SFRP.S. Janet, I love your poem too!!! I think I should wallpaper difficult child 3(?)/easy child(?)'s room in it, lol...!!!
ThreeShadows
Quid me anxia?
I think you should read her paper during her wedding reception. I used to fantasize about recording the difficult children' temper tantrums and playing them for their wedding guests....
This is AWESOME!!! Abusive Parental Nagging!!!!!! Not only is this a MUST SAVE item - esp to share with HER KIDS, it is just amazing!! Truly wonderful for a great laugh!!!
Please ask this legal/medica;/psychiatric scholar what it is called when a child asks over and over and over for something even when they know that it is NEVER going to happen?
What is the name for THAT??? Cause I am willing to bet the farm that when the difficult child who wrote this report wants something, her parents do NOT hear the end of it for weeks, maybe even for MONTHS.
PLEASE let us know what the teacher says!!!!!! You may want to email the teacher privately to get her response and the grade because if the teacher is not wildly enthusiastic and singing difficult child's praises for being such an amazing scholar and researcher, along with being such a poor abused child who has persevered through horrific abuse, well, your difficult child is not likely to share what the teacher says. She will likely explain away the teacher's reaction as part of a vast conspiracy against teens.
This reminds me of the years taht Wiz was completely convinced that the entire purpose for New Year's Eve and staying up late at adults only parties that night was so that adults could conspire with each other to find new methods of cruel and unusual punishment to use against kids. We never did figure out who told Wiz this, or why he thought it happened, but we never denied it!!!
Please ask this legal/medica;/psychiatric scholar what it is called when a child asks over and over and over for something even when they know that it is NEVER going to happen?
What is the name for THAT??? Cause I am willing to bet the farm that when the difficult child who wrote this report wants something, her parents do NOT hear the end of it for weeks, maybe even for MONTHS.
PLEASE let us know what the teacher says!!!!!! You may want to email the teacher privately to get her response and the grade because if the teacher is not wildly enthusiastic and singing difficult child's praises for being such an amazing scholar and researcher, along with being such a poor abused child who has persevered through horrific abuse, well, your difficult child is not likely to share what the teacher says. She will likely explain away the teacher's reaction as part of a vast conspiracy against teens.
This reminds me of the years taht Wiz was completely convinced that the entire purpose for New Year's Eve and staying up late at adults only parties that night was so that adults could conspire with each other to find new methods of cruel and unusual punishment to use against kids. We never did figure out who told Wiz this, or why he thought it happened, but we never denied it!!!
DammitJanet
Well-Known Member
These are the things for which parents are required to hold on to until very special times when you can whip out these little gems and embarrass your grown child completely. The very essence for which a parent lives. Believe me...it is sweet!
Cory used to have a bad problem with encopresis. Of course that led to streaks and skid marks in his undies. Well, somewhere along the line Tony got to calling him "The Streaker" as in that old song...
Well, when Cory started dating and bringing girls to the house, Tony would just casually say something like...well...Streak...I mean Cory...and Cory would fly out the house...lmao. It got so bad that all Tony had to do was hum the song...lmao. "yeah they call him the streak, fastest thing on two feet"...lmao.
Then there was the time we told all Jamies friends about his suckie...sigh.
Cory used to have a bad problem with encopresis. Of course that led to streaks and skid marks in his undies. Well, somewhere along the line Tony got to calling him "The Streaker" as in that old song...
Well, when Cory started dating and bringing girls to the house, Tony would just casually say something like...well...Streak...I mean Cory...and Cory would fly out the house...lmao. It got so bad that all Tony had to do was hum the song...lmao. "yeah they call him the streak, fastest thing on two feet"...lmao.
Then there was the time we told all Jamies friends about his suckie...sigh.
I am glad that everyone has had a good laugh!For those of you who wondered whether difficult child was serious or whether the teacher will find this amusing, here are the details:
The assignment was to pick a topic with some controversy and then present each point of view on the issue. Students were to find facts, statistics, expert opinions, etc and present a list of "works cited" in support of each side.
Some of the topics chosen by other students in the class include -
Abortion
Separation of Church and State
Use of Animals in the Entertainment Industry
Proposed Legislation that Prohibits the Slaughter of Horses
As for difficult child? Yes, she is completely serious. Yes, she absolutely believes that she is an abused child and that she suffers far more than any other child on the planet. (On a side note, one of her recent complaints of "abuse" to the therapist is that we do not buy enough ice cream...so that gives you an idea.) difficult child believes that parents telling their children what to do is a form of verbal abuse.
I have no idea where she got her statistics about nagging causing low grades and a 30% dropout rate amongst college students. I suspect that she made it up.
And on her "opposing" side...which should be in support of 'abusive parental nagging'....she lists the parents' need to exercise their vocal chords. Nope - not kidding!
I'm not sure how this report is going to fly with the teacher. Part of me is pretty sure the teacher is going to make her re-do the assignment.
But yes, I am thinking of sending the teacher an email to get her feedback.
Did I want to give difficult child some pointers on chossing a more appropriate topic?
Absolutely! But then, that would just be me being 'abusive' again.
So I am "detaching" and sitting back and watching.
It is pretty funny.....although I don't think that difficult child will feel that way.
We'll see what the teacher says....
Is your difficult child delusional? She seems to have NO contact with reality if she truly believes this stuff. Is her therapist aware that she is so far from reality??
I know Wiz would argue that all sorts of things were child abuse, including having to wear clean clothes every day. Regardless of how hard he argued his point, he clearly knew that he was being an idiot and that no one would even investigate us for reports of "child abuse" based on making him change clothes, eat anything that wasn't junk AND his idea, or any of the things your difficult child calls abuse. While he was not about to admit that he was full of it, it was clear to all of us that he was aware of it. the few cases where it was clear that he truly believed what he was saying were when we got really scared for him. The major one that sticks in my mind was the belief that if he could just get to Japan he could find and capture one and bring it home to the US where it would live with us and behave the way he trained it - exactly like the cartoons.
What does her therapist say when difficult child complains of being abused by the ice cream deficiency?
I doubt you will find out what the teacher says unless you email the teacher. We wouldn't want her to think you are attempting to "control" her mind or conspire against her with the teacher.
Geez. I thought I had it bad as a kid. For years I swore my mom only had me to sand the baseboards and spackle the low spots. But only when I was really really furious with her about something.
This will be PRICELESS when she has her own children. Absolutely PRICELESS!
I know Wiz would argue that all sorts of things were child abuse, including having to wear clean clothes every day. Regardless of how hard he argued his point, he clearly knew that he was being an idiot and that no one would even investigate us for reports of "child abuse" based on making him change clothes, eat anything that wasn't junk AND his idea, or any of the things your difficult child calls abuse. While he was not about to admit that he was full of it, it was clear to all of us that he was aware of it. the few cases where it was clear that he truly believed what he was saying were when we got really scared for him. The major one that sticks in my mind was the belief that if he could just get to Japan he could find and capture one and bring it home to the US where it would live with us and behave the way he trained it - exactly like the cartoons.
What does her therapist say when difficult child complains of being abused by the ice cream deficiency?
I doubt you will find out what the teacher says unless you email the teacher. We wouldn't want her to think you are attempting to "control" her mind or conspire against her with the teacher.
Geez. I thought I had it bad as a kid. For years I swore my mom only had me to sand the baseboards and spackle the low spots. But only when I was really really furious with her about something.
This will be PRICELESS when she has her own children. Absolutely PRICELESS!
TerryJ2
Well-Known Member
Wow, that's quite a topic! I suspect the teacher will have her redo the paper.
Definitely, save a copy of it.
I have a friend who taught English at the college frosh level for a yr. You wouldn't believe some of the papers kids turned in. Sad to say, your daughter is in good company.
One of the main things is that for research, kids use Glamour magazine Hairdo magazine when they're supposed to use juried journals. No kidding!
Definitely, save a copy of it.
I have a friend who taught English at the college frosh level for a yr. You wouldn't believe some of the papers kids turned in. Sad to say, your daughter is in good company.
One of the main things is that for research, kids use Glamour magazine Hairdo magazine when they're supposed to use juried journals. No kidding!
Frame that!
My youngest had to do a writing assingment in first grade about a parent. He wote about husband, he said , "My dad does not act like an adult, he is a party animal." He is so NOT a "party animal", plus where in the world would easy child ever even hear the expresion party animal is beyond any of us. It's still in a frame, even though easy child is 17.
Thanks for the laugh!!! Let us know what the teacher says.
My youngest had to do a writing assingment in first grade about a parent. He wote about husband, he said , "My dad does not act like an adult, he is a party animal." He is so NOT a "party animal", plus where in the world would easy child ever even hear the expresion party animal is beyond any of us. It's still in a frame, even though easy child is 17.
Thanks for the laugh!!! Let us know what the teacher says.
Gee, all WE have is the discipline report that Wiz got in kindergarten where he told the recess monitor his name was Jack. You can guess the 3 letter last name he gave. It starts with A. But it isn't as good as what my Gma had. I got in trouble for having a C one year and my Gma thought it was too harsh. She pulled out my father's first grade report card. He flunked - EVERYTHING. He was out with chicken pox and then scarlet fever and then strep and then refused to cooperate for a while (not that anyone knew it then, but my dad is totally Aspie in so many many ways, lol).
Want to see a grown man blush? Show a teacher's child the report card where he missed almost 1/2 of a school year and then flunked because he was "uncooperative". ROFLMAO!!
Want to see a grown man blush? Show a teacher's child the report card where he missed almost 1/2 of a school year and then flunked because he was "uncooperative". ROFLMAO!!
Marguerite
Active Member
difficult child 3 overheard me complaining about how difficult it is to get Special Provisions for him, for his state-based exams. Because some wealthy kids in private schools have parents who can afford to buy off various medical specialists to write reports to justify special provisions for kids who don't need them, in order to give these kids every possible edge to get the best marks and get into the top uni courses, kids with genuine disabilities are now finding it almost impossible to get the provisions they need. We just did the two exams difficult child 3 had to do, this week. And again, it just wasn't possible for him to show what he could do, because we couldn't get extra time, one very important provision.
Anyway, he had overheard me talking to his SpEd teacher on the phone earlier this year just when he had an assessment task to write for English. He was supposed to write a letter of complaint, or a letter to the editor, or something similar. I was not allowed to help him AT ALL - not even to say, "Close your eyes and pick a topic at random." So he wrote a letter to the Board of Studies (those responsible for state exams and Special Provisions) complaining about how difficult it was and how this was unfair. It began well - he was fluent, he was persuasive. Then it degenerated almost into abuse. He clearly got facts wrong (although the teacher marking it would not have known this) and finished with, "If you don't want to deal with me about this, then you will have to deal with my mother. And she will MAKE you see reason. She's done it before to many others. You will not escape." Cue maniacal laughter, I thought, shuddering. Thankfully that letter was only for the teacher to mark, it was not to be sent on to its destination (or we would NEVER, ever get any Special Provisions!). I had to sit on my hands and say absolutely nothing to him about wrong facts, about threatening language, about anything. I just printed it, attached it to his paperwork and posted it off for him. We both signed the form that said it was all his own work.
The ultimate irony - the teacher said it was so good that I must have written it for him. So I emailed copy to SpEd, who immediately went on the warpath to make it clear that if I had had any hand in it, it would have at least been accurate.
So be aware - the teacher may give marks for passion in her writing. Not properly referencing it may not score highly on the grading.
What we worked out with difficult child 3's output in English this year - when the writing task was unlimited time (as in he had a couple of weeks to write it) and he could make it relevant to himself, he wrote brilliantly and got amazing marks. But when he had a time limit to his work and especially when he couldn't see how it was anything to do with him and he was not interested - almost zero. It's been a horrible year for me, but would you believe - they are passing him through, based purely on attendance and willingness to do the work. He's been present, in other words. They're not doing this specially for difficult child 3 - it is how this exam has been diluted in general across the state.
But from next year, the grading gets a lot more serious.
A child's ability to write with passion and fluency is sometimes all the teacher really cares about. On the plus side with your daughter's assignment - she completed it. She wrote with fluency and passion. She at least made an attempt to write something from the other point of view. She was as persuasive as she could be, with a very challenging topic choice. It certainly was controversial. All these will result in a better grade than you or I would have given. Credit is likely to be given merely because she made an attempt at a really difficult topic. The teacher may not realise she was serious - the teacher may even feel tis was written as an example of irony and this also would raise the marks.
On the minus side, she did not reference it properly (because no such references really exist). She wrote what she apparently genuinely believes to a delusional extent (the delusional is the problem here; writing what you believe is good). She also was unable to properly write a rebuttal. These will bring her grade down.
I will not be surprised if she actually gets a good mark for this. I would be disappointed, but remember - the teacher has to grade this according to the learning outcomes of this particular assignment, and also in accordance with the overall standard of the other students' work. And frankly, I am horrified these days at how low the standard seems to be.
Mind you, I suspect a copy of this will be getting passed around the staffroom - and possibly the teacher may be a lot more sympathetic to you in the future! But only if she realises this was serious.
Marg
Anyway, he had overheard me talking to his SpEd teacher on the phone earlier this year just when he had an assessment task to write for English. He was supposed to write a letter of complaint, or a letter to the editor, or something similar. I was not allowed to help him AT ALL - not even to say, "Close your eyes and pick a topic at random." So he wrote a letter to the Board of Studies (those responsible for state exams and Special Provisions) complaining about how difficult it was and how this was unfair. It began well - he was fluent, he was persuasive. Then it degenerated almost into abuse. He clearly got facts wrong (although the teacher marking it would not have known this) and finished with, "If you don't want to deal with me about this, then you will have to deal with my mother. And she will MAKE you see reason. She's done it before to many others. You will not escape." Cue maniacal laughter, I thought, shuddering. Thankfully that letter was only for the teacher to mark, it was not to be sent on to its destination (or we would NEVER, ever get any Special Provisions!). I had to sit on my hands and say absolutely nothing to him about wrong facts, about threatening language, about anything. I just printed it, attached it to his paperwork and posted it off for him. We both signed the form that said it was all his own work.
The ultimate irony - the teacher said it was so good that I must have written it for him. So I emailed copy to SpEd, who immediately went on the warpath to make it clear that if I had had any hand in it, it would have at least been accurate.
So be aware - the teacher may give marks for passion in her writing. Not properly referencing it may not score highly on the grading.
What we worked out with difficult child 3's output in English this year - when the writing task was unlimited time (as in he had a couple of weeks to write it) and he could make it relevant to himself, he wrote brilliantly and got amazing marks. But when he had a time limit to his work and especially when he couldn't see how it was anything to do with him and he was not interested - almost zero. It's been a horrible year for me, but would you believe - they are passing him through, based purely on attendance and willingness to do the work. He's been present, in other words. They're not doing this specially for difficult child 3 - it is how this exam has been diluted in general across the state.
But from next year, the grading gets a lot more serious.
A child's ability to write with passion and fluency is sometimes all the teacher really cares about. On the plus side with your daughter's assignment - she completed it. She wrote with fluency and passion. She at least made an attempt to write something from the other point of view. She was as persuasive as she could be, with a very challenging topic choice. It certainly was controversial. All these will result in a better grade than you or I would have given. Credit is likely to be given merely because she made an attempt at a really difficult topic. The teacher may not realise she was serious - the teacher may even feel tis was written as an example of irony and this also would raise the marks.
On the minus side, she did not reference it properly (because no such references really exist). She wrote what she apparently genuinely believes to a delusional extent (the delusional is the problem here; writing what you believe is good). She also was unable to properly write a rebuttal. These will bring her grade down.
I will not be surprised if she actually gets a good mark for this. I would be disappointed, but remember - the teacher has to grade this according to the learning outcomes of this particular assignment, and also in accordance with the overall standard of the other students' work. And frankly, I am horrified these days at how low the standard seems to be.
Mind you, I suspect a copy of this will be getting passed around the staffroom - and possibly the teacher may be a lot more sympathetic to you in the future! But only if she realises this was serious.
Marg
H
HaoZi
Guest
Reminds me of the "adult conspiracy" from Piers Anthony's Xanth series.
Yup. Wiz had not even heard of Piers Anthony at that point, but it is similar. I remember when he read those books - he commented on it. LOL.
As far as grading writing goes, a few years ago some of the grad students at the university here did a study that showed that the most accurate way to predict the grading on the writing portion of the tests that each student has to take to graduate high school is NOT by reading the papers, by weighing them, or by looking at the length or number of words written. It was to toss ALL the papers up into the air in a stairwell. Those that landed in certain areas got A's, B's etc...
The really SAD thing is that this study was done with that option as something they were positive would NOT be accurate. The study was critiqued by a world class statistician who teaches survey design and was very well designed. It was really shocking that the stairwell toss was more accurate than any other method used. Of course the amt of time the graders have for each paper is less than 1 minute - the time is allotted by the state. Each grader has to do so many tests in so many days. To spend more than a minute on a paper would mean they don't sleep, eat or take any breaks for the few days they have to grade the papers.
Then there was a study that was written up online last week about getting the best score on the SATs. The longer the answer to the essays is, the better the grade was. Factual accuracy, spelling, punctuation, even grammar are not predictors or seemingly weighed very heavily. The longer an answer is the higher the score is. Regardless of what the answer says. Eons ago when I was in high school one of my classmates wrote a fiction story instead of answering the essay questions. She got an amazingly high score but it was very long. It truly did NOT answer or even mention anything that the question asked. She did it on purpose to see what would happen. She had already been accepted to the college of her choice with a full scholarship and was leaving school at Christmas anyway, so she wanted to see what would happen.
I do hope the teacher has a response to the paper that is worthy of it.
As far as grading writing goes, a few years ago some of the grad students at the university here did a study that showed that the most accurate way to predict the grading on the writing portion of the tests that each student has to take to graduate high school is NOT by reading the papers, by weighing them, or by looking at the length or number of words written. It was to toss ALL the papers up into the air in a stairwell. Those that landed in certain areas got A's, B's etc...
The really SAD thing is that this study was done with that option as something they were positive would NOT be accurate. The study was critiqued by a world class statistician who teaches survey design and was very well designed. It was really shocking that the stairwell toss was more accurate than any other method used. Of course the amt of time the graders have for each paper is less than 1 minute - the time is allotted by the state. Each grader has to do so many tests in so many days. To spend more than a minute on a paper would mean they don't sleep, eat or take any breaks for the few days they have to grade the papers.
Then there was a study that was written up online last week about getting the best score on the SATs. The longer the answer to the essays is, the better the grade was. Factual accuracy, spelling, punctuation, even grammar are not predictors or seemingly weighed very heavily. The longer an answer is the higher the score is. Regardless of what the answer says. Eons ago when I was in high school one of my classmates wrote a fiction story instead of answering the essay questions. She got an amazingly high score but it was very long. It truly did NOT answer or even mention anything that the question asked. She did it on purpose to see what would happen. She had already been accepted to the college of her choice with a full scholarship and was leaving school at Christmas anyway, so she wanted to see what would happen.
I do hope the teacher has a response to the paper that is worthy of it.
TerryJ2
Well-Known Member
Eons ago when I was in high school one of my classmates wrote a fiction story instead of answering the essay questions. She got an amazingly high score but it was very long. It truly did NOT answer or even mention anything that the question asked. She did it on purpose to see what would happen. She had already been accepted to the college of her choice with a full scholarship and was leaving school at Christmas anyway, so she wanted to see what would happen.
I do hope the teacher has a response to the paper that is worthy of it.
Oh, dear.
It won't do any good if this teacher has a non-reaction. Fingers crossed.
I do hope the teacher has a response to the paper that is worthy of it.
Oh, dear.
It won't do any good if this teacher has a non-reaction. Fingers crossed.
UPDATE:
So I contacted the teacher....who did find difficult child's topic amusing. She said it was the only paper on this topic that she had ever received, ever - so she found it pretty entertaining.
However, she did feel that difficult child could have used a little more logic...and the arguments were lacking substance.
difficult child received a "C".
So I contacted the teacher....who did find difficult child's topic amusing. She said it was the only paper on this topic that she had ever received, ever - so she found it pretty entertaining.
However, she did feel that difficult child could have used a little more logic...and the arguments were lacking substance.
difficult child received a "C".
Marguerite
Active Member
Did difficult child get good feedback? such as "your topic was novel, but lacked backing arguments to justify. References please? REAL ones?"
And if she did, would difficult child take them on board? I must admit, when I was difficult child's age - if I felt passionate about a topic I wrote about and then felt my arguments had fallen on deaf ears, I would not have taken the critique on board at all. it took me some years more to learn how to be balanced and rational when I was particularly passionate about a topic.
Marg
And if she did, would difficult child take them on board? I must admit, when I was difficult child's age - if I felt passionate about a topic I wrote about and then felt my arguments had fallen on deaf ears, I would not have taken the critique on board at all. it took me some years more to learn how to be balanced and rational when I was particularly passionate about a topic.
Marg
I agree!
Marg--
No, difficult child was not able to receive constructive criticism. In her mind, her paper was FANTASTIC and anything less than a perfect grade means the teacher is a witch...
O well - can't win 'em all.
