klmno
Active Member
neighborhood issue...
So, difficult child just gets off the ankle bracelet and gets a little freedom back. He had been able to play and ride his bike right in front of the house, but that was it for 4 mos. He's lost his best (really his only) friend, so he has no place to go to hang out with kids his own age that I approve of in this neighborhood.
We live on a cul-de-sac at the end of a street that is about 1 to 1 1/2 blocks long. All the kids, which range in ages from 2 to 15 play in the street. The 15 yo is a girl with a major weight problem, and she is out walking a lot because she's really working on losing weight. difficult child is next, at 13, then the next is a boy about 10-11. The 15 yo really is only out there occassionally.
The mom of two younger ones (7 and 5), who happen to be the younger siblings of the 15 yo, had told difficult child a couple of weeks ago that she didn't want difficult child playing with her kids. Used to, difficult child would try to toss a nerf ball or play hide-and-seek with the ones from 5-10yo, but the mom wanted that to stop with difficult child. She doesn't mind if her younger ones still play with the 10 yo.
It hurt difficult child's feelings because it isn't like he's trying to "hang out" with a 5 and 7 yo, it is that the kids are just playing in the cul-de-sac like neighborhood kids do and he doesn't understand why the 10-11 yo can run out there, but he can't. I told him just stay away, but they are playing all over the street and they come and ask difficult child to play or pass ball, etc. difficult child speaks to them to be polite and I have told him that they don't own the street- he shouldn't play with them, but he can ride his bike or whatever, he doesn't have to come inside just because they are out there.
Today, all of them were out- including the 15 yo. So, difficult child went and talked to her a bit. Then, he asked if he could go for a walk with her and I said sure (he could stand to lose weight too). She went inside for a few mins before they left- the next thing I know, difficult child is out there passing ball with the 2 younger siblings, plus a 7 yo and the 7 yo's parent. I called him over and he said he was waiting on O. She came out, then they went for a walk. About that time, here comes the Mom out and she starts talking to the 7 yo's parent.
I just have a concern that the Mom is going to make issue over difficult child being around at all. I'm sure that she is concerned if she's heard him rage at some point or if she saw him walking on the roof a few mos ago when he was manic, or maybe she's seen county cars over here through this legal ordeal. But, difficult child has NEVER done anything out of line around any of those kids and they are always where many parents can see them- never inside anyone's house alone. Her kids have never even needed a bandaid as a result of difficult child.
I just hate for him to end up feeling pushed away and "rejected" because of this. Yet, I don't know the mom well enough to talk to her about it.
Any suggestions?
So, difficult child just gets off the ankle bracelet and gets a little freedom back. He had been able to play and ride his bike right in front of the house, but that was it for 4 mos. He's lost his best (really his only) friend, so he has no place to go to hang out with kids his own age that I approve of in this neighborhood.
We live on a cul-de-sac at the end of a street that is about 1 to 1 1/2 blocks long. All the kids, which range in ages from 2 to 15 play in the street. The 15 yo is a girl with a major weight problem, and she is out walking a lot because she's really working on losing weight. difficult child is next, at 13, then the next is a boy about 10-11. The 15 yo really is only out there occassionally.
The mom of two younger ones (7 and 5), who happen to be the younger siblings of the 15 yo, had told difficult child a couple of weeks ago that she didn't want difficult child playing with her kids. Used to, difficult child would try to toss a nerf ball or play hide-and-seek with the ones from 5-10yo, but the mom wanted that to stop with difficult child. She doesn't mind if her younger ones still play with the 10 yo.
It hurt difficult child's feelings because it isn't like he's trying to "hang out" with a 5 and 7 yo, it is that the kids are just playing in the cul-de-sac like neighborhood kids do and he doesn't understand why the 10-11 yo can run out there, but he can't. I told him just stay away, but they are playing all over the street and they come and ask difficult child to play or pass ball, etc. difficult child speaks to them to be polite and I have told him that they don't own the street- he shouldn't play with them, but he can ride his bike or whatever, he doesn't have to come inside just because they are out there.
Today, all of them were out- including the 15 yo. So, difficult child went and talked to her a bit. Then, he asked if he could go for a walk with her and I said sure (he could stand to lose weight too). She went inside for a few mins before they left- the next thing I know, difficult child is out there passing ball with the 2 younger siblings, plus a 7 yo and the 7 yo's parent. I called him over and he said he was waiting on O. She came out, then they went for a walk. About that time, here comes the Mom out and she starts talking to the 7 yo's parent.
I just have a concern that the Mom is going to make issue over difficult child being around at all. I'm sure that she is concerned if she's heard him rage at some point or if she saw him walking on the roof a few mos ago when he was manic, or maybe she's seen county cars over here through this legal ordeal. But, difficult child has NEVER done anything out of line around any of those kids and they are always where many parents can see them- never inside anyone's house alone. Her kids have never even needed a bandaid as a result of difficult child.
I just hate for him to end up feeling pushed away and "rejected" because of this. Yet, I don't know the mom well enough to talk to her about it.
Any suggestions?