That is hilarious susie, the druid bit because ironically. My beliefs are Druidry and Celtic Shamanism (NO I'm not offended at all by your story, I actually found it hilarious and amusing).
Hubby is the same as yours, he gets roped into it. It's that non-confrontational personality of his. A blessing and a bane at the same time, he's the one that in the group of friends who is always bending over backward for people, who is always caring of people. Wants to make people laugh when they are feeling down or up, he cares about how people are doing and has strong friendships and relationships both with me and his family (including extended family). I mean this is a man who sold his beloved cerwin vega speakers for 600 bucks (worth 2000) to feed his kids and wife. The very speakers that he dreamed of having since he was 6 yrs old and his uncle had a pair. The very speakers that meant a lot of pride to him. He's sold his stuff to keep us a float, worked 24\7 to give to his kids and me anything and everything we needed, wanted or desired. Sacrificed his health at times and even mental health in the towing industry. He's busted his butt for family, friends and never complains, not once has he made a complaint with these sacrifices in life.
He has given his everything to those he cares about. Hence the bane and curse part. People are drawn to him and his charismatic personality, his sense of sweet and gentle humor. He has "stage presence" whether he's goofing off or being serious. Total strangers have said he is an attractive personality without even knowing what he looks like or really who he is. He's always been able to make me laugh even if I didn't want to or felt like I couldn't.
Yes, he now knows I won't rip into him if this would ever happen again and I wouldn't make it public. Last night he said that was what shocked him the most that it wasn't made public, that I didn't go off the deep end or rip into him. That I was calm and collected and that I didn't yell, scream, cry or worse. He wanted to ask for help, wanted to tell but just didn't know how to and desperately needed to. He has tells when he lies (I'm hearing impaired so I see the body language the micro expressions very easily. It's whether I chose to ignore them or not that makes it the hard part, especially when one is denying that it could happen if that makes sense). He stutters, he trails off and doesn't look at me directly but side glances when he lies or hides things or when he feels guilty. Last nights confrontation he did none of these things. I know he's telling the truth.
I'm really happy that everything is settling back into place, I never intended it to break us and knew it would be something that we'd grow from and getter stronger because of.
