Hi! Welcome to both of you. I have a 17yo difficult child named Wiz. He has Asperger's and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). He is also suicidal anytime he is taken off his medications or they are weaned down. They work, so we don't mess with them. He was very very violent and is now living with my parents, about 15 min away from us. (husband is his biofather, but he needed to be the only child in the house. wish they had told us before I was preg with the 3rd kid. Sigh.)
Wiz is a real success. It was a long hard road. He was on depakote, risperdal and concerta for about 3 or 4 years. It worked very well. Eventually the risperdal stopped working as well and we had a tough time finding this new medication combo.
It sounds as if your son needs the added effects of depakote. It is an antiseizure medication, so it is very important that he take the dose and NOT stop it with-o the doctor's OK. If you stop it cold turkey he can have seizures, even if he never had a seizure before. They don't always warn you of this before you start. Just make sure you never run out.
The violent behavior is a problem. You need to make sure that the kids all tell you if he is violent. Wiz managed to hide his violence to his sister by telling her he would kill our youngest son. I learned this by walking into her room and finding him choking her. It was the middle of the night and I couldn't figure out why the cat was pestering me and tehn went into her room.
You may need to consider alarms to place on his door at night if he is a night wanderer. Do what you need to so that everyone is safe.
We are here for both of you newbies!! You won't find a more accepting, understanding and supportive website or in real life community, in my opinion. There just aren't any.
I am glad you both found us, and sorry you both need us.
Sending big snuggly welcoming hugs!