difficult child just called...oh my gosh

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by buddy, Oct 24, 2011.

  1. buddy

    buddy New Member

    He said hi mom, I said HI, I love you...

    He said love you too (automatic response) then he said. I am not ready to come home because I am still mad at you.

    I said that is fair. We can talk more about that with your therapist.

    He said, it will take me five days because I am not over it.

    I said again, that is fair, good job for telling me.

    He said, and if it takes longer then it will be longer.

    OMG I sure as heck hope they are not giving him the idea he gets to fully decide. He needs clear instructions that mom is the boss because that is Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) 101!!!!!
  2. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip


    No, he doesn't get to decide.

    But... If he's still angry... Him coming home is NOT a good idea...

  3. Liahona

    Liahona Guest

    Have you been able to talk to the therapist or is difficult child talking to staff?
  4. buddy

    buddy New Member

    No, I thought it was a little funny but also thought the same thing... I think it is great he is talking about how he feels but he can't make up the rules. That is why I said it is a fair idea and we will talk to his therapist. Since it is monday morning I assume they are meeting him for the first time. I am going to call to make sure that I dont have to wait till tomorrow's scheduled social worker meeting to talk to anyone about him. This is too long. Of course they have lots to do. The outside docs all have to be contacted and talked to etc. I get that but it is torture being out of the loop. My biggest fear is they will only consider what they are currently seeing and hearing from him rather than looking at the big picture. I express that concern out loud and his own docs hear me I think. But you never know...docs are prone to peer pressure too so I need to make sure they remember I need them to really advocate for him to be in the least restrictive environment that is safe and supportive. I am not reckless...I would never endagnger myself or him.... I just know the differences and know him very well....I want them to listen to that. I know most dont, seems like that is a lot of what I am hearing from many here, but I am trying...
  5. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Buddy, knowing our kids, he will not be as angry in a day or so. Even with-these disorders, they are so resilient and changeable it's amazing. You said all the right things. :) And so did he. :)
    I understand what you are saying, and would keep your eyes open, but still, I'll bet he doesn't stay mad. He is in such a completely different environment ...
  6. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    Still give him a huge pat on the back for using his words and saying how he's feeling. That, to me, is progress!!