difficult child kicked out on Friday

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Kjs, Jun 10, 2007.

  1. Kjs

    Kjs Guest

    School year Almost over. Full day on Monday and 1/2 day on Tuesday. Must make up the snow/cold days.
    All tests were completed by last thursday. difficult child recieved his quarter grades on Friday. difficult child calls me on Friday from VP's office. Says, "come get me" (this is about 12:44) his lunch is at 1pm. I asked what happened. difficult child said he was having good day, in science they launched their rockets. Went to next class and everyone was talking about the rockets they just launched and he gets yelled at for talking and asked to leave. That not being what upset me, it is when difficult child said that he is not allowed to go eat lunch in the lunch room. He has to get his lunch and eat it in the office. Now I am mad. School is pretty much complete. Kids are all excited. I am sure there were more than just difficult child talking. And the ONE time when he IS allowed to talk with friends is Lunch, and they aren't going to let him do that?
    I went to school. To the VP's office. Asked where the referral was I wanted to view difficult child's comments.(because he never allows him to write comments). VP said he doesn't have one yet. I told him the teacher is suppose to send a form with him when sent to the office.(Program director showed me the three forms, ONE of which is required to be filled out and sent with student). Informed BiPolar (BP) that it is a district guideline that all referrals include student statement. I told difficult child to go clean out his locker. Advised VP that regardless of what happened in the classroom to not allow difficult child to have lunch with his friends is unacceptable. He is not accused of doing anything, only talking.
    (no talking back, just plain talking) All kids talk, only he is the only one I know that gets removed from class every day for it. I was just so mad, I let VP know also.
    When we were on our way home, difficult child asked if he can just be done and not go back. Nope. Monday and 1/2 on Tuesday, then he can be done. They are suppose to walk to Burger King for lunch on Monday. (he is never allowed to go anywhere. did not recieve permission slip either) So, if the entire class goes to lunch at Burger King and difficult child is not allowed, I will pick him up on Monday also.
    In my meeting with the Program director last Thursday. She was telling me stories about difficult child. She was laughing and telling me he has such a good sense of humor. Too bad teachers don't see that. She said sometimes the teachers need to just laugh when something is funny. difficult child is funny, but difficult child needs to know when it is appropriate or not. Teachers just are not willing to budge from their classwork, and if anyone breaks the atmosphere they want then they are removed. Being difficult child.
    difficult child had baseball game today, then went to amusement park with friend.
    Even though difficult child will soon be on summer vacation...it feels like I'll be on vacation! Knowing that in six weeks I will be looking forward to school starting.
  2. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    It might be good to wait for the explanation to come in from the teacher. Sometimes what kids report as the behavior that got them in trouble doesn't always gel with what really happened. And in the school I taught it was the preferred procedure to send the written form down with the kids, sometimes there were circumstances that prevented me from doing that on the spot and I *had* to send the child down.

    Lunch/recess detention is very common from upper elementary on up.

    I don't mean to defend everything that happened on this day and no doubt I'd be upset but you don't have the full story yet so I'd reserve that anger for the school staff until you do.

    Sorry this happened so near the end of the year. Kids and staff have pretty much had it by this time. Last year my difficult child did his first time in the principal's office with 2 friends EVER with 4 hours left on the last day of school. He's never a behavioral problem at school--he just got out of control with his buddies.
  3. Kjs

    Kjs Guest

    Maybe if this was an isolated incident. I am finding out he has been removed from class almost everyday, and sits in the office. Nobody has informed us of this. When I asked to see his behavior records he must have 100 referrals in there. I was only notified of TWO all year. There are times when I know difficult child causes his own troubles, however after speaking to this teacher and actually going to his classroom and seeing for myself, I honestly feel any normal student or adult for that matter would be upset with what was going on. And on this particular day I went to the office and asked the VP if I can go to his class and VP had told me NO. He told me I had to wait in the office and he would report back to me. I have a hard time accepting that a parent cannot go to their childs classroom. After insisting, vp accompanied me to the class. He knew things weren't right before I even went.
    Other situations where difficult child had been blamed, and police threatened only to review security tapes and see difficult child did NOT do it. This was happening way to often for me to believe the school anymore.
    My sister and sister in law are both teachers and I do hear plenty of stories, both good and bad. They both admit doing some of the very things I complain about. Such as targeting a specific student if they do not like them. They say it is just "natural" to do. They say this with no regard to what it does to the student. Then the parents have to deal with the attitude "why shouldn't I do it, I get blamed for it anyway and get punished for it, so I may as well do it".
    Don't get me wrong, I support the school most of the time. When I see something out of line either by difficult child or teachers I let them know.
  4. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    I read and commented on your "new IEP" thread. Hopefully, this nonsense will not continue next year!
  5. Alisonlg

    Alisonlg New Member

    Ugh. I'm so sorry. How frustrating!
  6. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I have been there done that. It is SOOOO frustrating because you "think" things
    are going ok and then WHAMO you find that there has been trouble
    on a regular basis. It can turn a saint violent!

    Yes, I do appreciate the school teachers in our CD family and I
    would never, ever, ever agree to be a school teacher BUT it is not suppose to be "them against us". There are suppose to be people in the middle who are helping both sides.

    Sending hugs. DDD
  7. Sunlight

    Sunlight Active Member

    I used to love summers with ant. he loved to go fishing, and was easy for me. school starting meant more wars.
    enjoy. your son will mature more over summer, and you will all be refreshed.