missusoverall
New Member
I need some help to sort my head out :confused:- the problem is I think my difficult child is messing with my head. He can be very manipulative and clever and I think he's worked out that inconsistent behaviour distances him further from anyone being able to help him or even discuss strategies. Does this make sense?
He exhibits aggressive/rude behaviour, he lies constantly, steals food/things or money, every day he vandalises or destroys something and tries to blame it on his little sister. The worst thing is - he smirks :mad:! He likes to see the chaos he causes (he verbalised this when he was 8 to a psychologist). An hour/minute later - he can't do enough to help, he exhibits charming and thoughtful behaviour. It's when he's like this that we talk to him about coping with life and the implications of what he does. Five minutes later he's hurting his twin and being punished again. The psychiatrist recommended sertraline to help get him out of this negative cycle.
After 4 weeks he's just as bad, it's as though he sees his depression as a convenient excuse to control us all. The psychiatrist told him as much while Alex just tipped the psychiatrist's pens out to play with and refused to speak in Catalan (in which he's fluent) and insisted on only speaking in English.
I suppose what I'm saying is that the closer we get to helping him - the more he pushes away or alienates himself. And I don't know why. I feel so hopeless and helpless. Is this not unusual??? Is he protecting his gfgness?? I just don't understand what we're dealing with. I know there isn't a magic wand and I feel clearer after writing to you all, but at the moment I feel a complete failure as his mom and can't even look at him anymore :crying:.
Keep trying to do the right thing but it doesn't work!
Any advice?
Sarah
He exhibits aggressive/rude behaviour, he lies constantly, steals food/things or money, every day he vandalises or destroys something and tries to blame it on his little sister. The worst thing is - he smirks :mad:! He likes to see the chaos he causes (he verbalised this when he was 8 to a psychologist). An hour/minute later - he can't do enough to help, he exhibits charming and thoughtful behaviour. It's when he's like this that we talk to him about coping with life and the implications of what he does. Five minutes later he's hurting his twin and being punished again. The psychiatrist recommended sertraline to help get him out of this negative cycle.
After 4 weeks he's just as bad, it's as though he sees his depression as a convenient excuse to control us all. The psychiatrist told him as much while Alex just tipped the psychiatrist's pens out to play with and refused to speak in Catalan (in which he's fluent) and insisted on only speaking in English.
I suppose what I'm saying is that the closer we get to helping him - the more he pushes away or alienates himself. And I don't know why. I feel so hopeless and helpless. Is this not unusual??? Is he protecting his gfgness?? I just don't understand what we're dealing with. I know there isn't a magic wand and I feel clearer after writing to you all, but at the moment I feel a complete failure as his mom and can't even look at him anymore :crying:.
Keep trying to do the right thing but it doesn't work!
Any advice?
Sarah