N
Nomad
Guest
I apologize if this comes off wrong...
Why is it that many women tend to be insecure?
I've had two experiences recently that have troubled me deeply.
First of all...a little background. I lost a fair amount of weight doing WW. Prior to that, combined with health issues and difficult child issues, I rarely dressed nicely and frowned a lot. Today, I am usually either at goal weight or very near it. I worked very hard to get there. I like to dress nicely. What I mean by that is that I pay attention to colors, I usually wear a little heal, I often have a little make up on and a little jewlery, etc. I don't dress NICELY all the time. If I go to the food store...I might not dress the best. If I go to the gym...I might look really bad actually...I don't care. But for the most part, I have my make up on and try to look my best. In addition, since my kids have moved out I have done some exciting things with my life. I am happier and it shows.
Of late, I have noticed that if I go to church without my husband...I am treated with COLD STARES by the women. And the men barely talk to me. I think it is possible that they have been told by their wives not to.
I'm not the greatest attendance wise...but my husband is even worse.
The last time this difference in the way people treat me...well it was VERY noticeable.
YET...I have NEVER been flirtateous, etc. not even a little. nada.
Today (not at church) I was talking about how dressing nicely makes a person feel better and how we can dress to hide figure flaws and someone got really upset with me and said that all that matters is what is inside. I totally "get" that...but I still think it doesn't change the fact that most of us like to dress up sometimes (when it is appropriate) and to hide our figure flaws so that they don't stand out.
I know this is so totally about folks feeling insecure...but ya know I have my moments too. For example, I would like to go to church by myself and not be treated like a tra-p (esp. when I haven't DONE A THING). This has upset me so terribly...husband says he will do his best to go and when he can't, I shouldn't go. I think there is a small chance that if he doesn't enjoy it...that we'll stop going.
Also, is there anything I can do short of dressing differently and putting the weight back on to stop narly women from treating me poorly?
Why is it that many women tend to be insecure?
I've had two experiences recently that have troubled me deeply.
First of all...a little background. I lost a fair amount of weight doing WW. Prior to that, combined with health issues and difficult child issues, I rarely dressed nicely and frowned a lot. Today, I am usually either at goal weight or very near it. I worked very hard to get there. I like to dress nicely. What I mean by that is that I pay attention to colors, I usually wear a little heal, I often have a little make up on and a little jewlery, etc. I don't dress NICELY all the time. If I go to the food store...I might not dress the best. If I go to the gym...I might look really bad actually...I don't care. But for the most part, I have my make up on and try to look my best. In addition, since my kids have moved out I have done some exciting things with my life. I am happier and it shows.
Of late, I have noticed that if I go to church without my husband...I am treated with COLD STARES by the women. And the men barely talk to me. I think it is possible that they have been told by their wives not to.
I'm not the greatest attendance wise...but my husband is even worse.
The last time this difference in the way people treat me...well it was VERY noticeable.
YET...I have NEVER been flirtateous, etc. not even a little. nada.
Today (not at church) I was talking about how dressing nicely makes a person feel better and how we can dress to hide figure flaws and someone got really upset with me and said that all that matters is what is inside. I totally "get" that...but I still think it doesn't change the fact that most of us like to dress up sometimes (when it is appropriate) and to hide our figure flaws so that they don't stand out.
I know this is so totally about folks feeling insecure...but ya know I have my moments too. For example, I would like to go to church by myself and not be treated like a tra-p (esp. when I haven't DONE A THING). This has upset me so terribly...husband says he will do his best to go and when he can't, I shouldn't go. I think there is a small chance that if he doesn't enjoy it...that we'll stop going.
Also, is there anything I can do short of dressing differently and putting the weight back on to stop narly women from treating me poorly?