He is not an addict!

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by toughlovin, Nov 21, 2012.

  1. toughlovin

    toughlovin Guest

    So the good news is that my friend in CA who has the phone finally got a FB message from difficult child. The message thanked him for his support, said he was hitchiking around and he was uncomfortable with the recovery thing because he had had some bad experiences AND he didnt think he was an addict. He could drink and smoke pot and had not had any real consequences from doing so!!!!

    Are you kidding me??? I mean what about being homeless with no help from home? What about being kicked out over and over again from programs and sober houses because you just had to find a way to get high???? I mean it is ridiculous really!!

    My friend said that kids his age usually do not see themselves as addicts... and it may be he is not using anything hugely physically addictive (which is good) so he does nto see himself as an addict. That is ok but I am in a screwy way amused.

    So difficult child is clearly not at a place where he is looking for help in recovery... and is on his way to a state that has legalized pot... his dream I am sure.

    This Thanksgiving I am thankful that he is alive and at least in touch sporadically and seems ok.

  2. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    My difficult child did not admit she was an addict until this year and she, too, lost everything over meth...now she will tell you how much she has lost and the living hades she lives every day because of her addiction.

    He will "get it" one day...(((HUGS)))
  3. garrison

    garrison New Member

    A person will continue with their addiction intill the pain of the addiction is greater than the pain of recovery. Because drugs (including alcohol)numbs the user, it takes a lot of pain to get to that point. If the addict is a strong person then it can take even longer to reach it.
    I am a recovering alcoholic. Please trust me when I say recovery is painful. One of the most profound things I've heard in recovery is, "No matter how far I walk down this road, I am always one step away from the ditch". It never goes away.
  4. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    TL this is exactly what my difficult child has said many times since she left the sober house. And of course we bring up all the things she has lost because of her drinking/pot and whatever else she is using and she maintains that she is not doing anything that everyone else doesn't do and she is not addicted. No matter that she has never held a job for longer than 4 months or that she was arrested for shoplifting just a month ago or that she was kicked out of college for drinking/drugs and that she was kicked out of her own home because of it and has lost all her old good friends. She doesn't see it that way but I guess that is the very definition of an addict.

    I'm glad you got the message that he is OK.

  5. Signorina

    Signorina Guest

    I am supposed to be cooking and cleaning but stopping long enough to write...

    I pray our kids never meet each other...peas in pods they are...

    Glad you heard from him; happy thanksgiving!
  6. AmericanGirl

    AmericanGirl Guest

    The fact you can be amused says a lot about your excellent mental health and stamina.
  7. toughlovin

    toughlovin Guest

    Thanks AG. I am definitely in a different place than I used to be. For me humor is a method of survival and I have to see the humor in his faulty thinking!!!

  8. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    It is good that you know he is ok. My brother was a heroin addict for most of his adult life. He is now 63 and finally clean. He still denies that he was an addict.