I know credit issues are handled differently in the US as they are here in Canada. But I am relieved that they didnt' phone back and pressure you further, and that you didn't make a payment beyond your limits, which was what they demanded.
Obviously, we all know our debts are our responsabilities. Reality however is that you are in a bad position right now. I know that your credit is affecting job potential, which I'm sure is a concern of yours understandably. Yet you must live. Is your mortgage - potential foreclosure issue- on your credit report already? If that is the case, your concern for the impact on your credit in terms of this card are probably misplaced as your credit will be much more impacted by mortgage being in arrears.
I would hate to see your financial position worsen over a unsecured credit debt. These are very trying times and never has there been a bigger number of people in the same position you are in. Knowing this, so do the credit companies and the collection agencies. I keep hearing horror stories of how far the bullying and threatening is going with creditors demanding payments and issuing forth all sorts of evil sounding backlash if the credit holder doesn't comply with their demands.
The thing is, what happens if your house issue gets settled? Does it magically disappear from your credit report??? If it remains, your credit will affect your job potential etc anyhow. And if thats the case, what on earth have you to gain by making yourself more desperatly cash strapped right now by making a payment on this card? I realize it is probably a pride thing too, desire to pay your own debts. But it isn't like you chose this. Most people in this position right now haven't chosen this. But it is what it is. You've got to eat. You've got to find a suitable solution to your living situation. You have alot on your plate.
Can you look into consumer protection laws for your region? I know that if you speak with someone here in Canada, they can only phone x amount of times max. per day/per week. If you request all contact by writing, they MUST comply here. They cannot contact you by telephone if you request to them to contact by mail only. This protects consumers from harrassing and illegal calls and bullying tactics that violate the law. It also ensures that they are committed to what they say since its in writing.
Have you EVER heard of a person getting a demand for payment letter from ANY creditor, that states "You have ONE HOUR from reciept of this letter to pay XXX amount payment. You MUST pay this payment by calling our number and providing your PERSONAL BANK ACCOUNT INFORMATION TO A STRANGER. Do it NOW or XXX is going to happen to you". I mean, come on. This is not natural collection practices and these collectors, wether in house or outside collectors, prey on people in desperate financial situations and their serious fears and insecurities about their financial future and repurcussions. It is rotten. I would hate to see you fall for it.
Frankly, I would say "Please put in WRITING that you are demanding personal banking information and a payment in ONE HOUR and what you are threatening me with". I would then go on to say "My free legal aid attorney has advised me to ask you for this in writing since he has a number of statues that he believes are being clearly violated. And he also requests that you personally, as the representative making these demands, please include your full name and your own personal banking information so when we win a lawsuit against you for illegal practices, we know which bank account to garnish". GRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(((hugs))) Things are going to get better for you. I know it. For now, take care of your basic needs before you let this stuff stress you out. You didn't choose this. It won't be fixed over night. And your focus should be on you and your difficult child and the immediate needs you have.