I think difficult child is over the guy

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by Nancy, Feb 16, 2012.

  1. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    The texts that my easy child read on difficult child's phone indicated she was drinking/smoking pot "responsibly" with this guy that was kicked out of his sober house. From checking her cell phone records there were texts and calls between the two of them every day and so of course I was worried besides being devastated over the relapse.

    She went to visit her girlfriend about 120 miles away Monday after work and came back yesterday and met me at the mall on the way back to her apartment. So that means she spent valentine's day with her girlfriend. I did some checking on her phone records and she has not been in contact with this guy for over a week and she told someone on fb that he was too clingy. I didn't come out and ask her but it appears as though she is back on track, interacting with all her sober friends again and going to meetings.

    I took her to the bank to open a savings account so her income tax refund can be deposited in there and she wants to use it to register for community college. I suggested she take only one class on her days off of work to start. She asked if we would help with some of her classes and I told her not until she proved to us that she was really serious and that would take several classes with good grades before we would consider it at all.

    I'm hoping this drinking responsibly thing is over.

  2. exhausted

    exhausted Active Member

    Oh-so good! It's all part of the dance of addiction isn't it? She turned around pretty quickly. Hope she seriously takes this class and does well. School could be life changing. Meet good people (the pool is better), enjoy her learning, and build confidence. Good work on your response and what an inspiration you are to the rest of us in how you handle her. :)
  3. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Thanks exhausted but as far as the good people go....she was taking classes there last year at this time and she found every pot smoking/pill popping drinker in her classes which led to her deep decline into an alcoholic state and being kicked out of our house.

    But one can always hope that she has matured a lot since then.

  4. toughlovin

    toughlovin Guest

    Sounds like she is getting back on track.... and on her own (no pressure from you) which is great. I think she is getting to the point where she really wants it for herself and has experienced things being better when she is sober. I hope it continues...

  5. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Great news, Nancy. I've told you before but I'll say it again . . . I have great hopes for your difficult child.

  6. pinevalley

    pinevalley Member


    It sounds like your daughter is really maturing and she is starting to think about her future with her college classes. This is great news, and I am so happy for you. We need some good news about a difficult child on this board now!
  7. Signorina

    Signorina Guest

    Wonderful news...

    I am so glad she is coming to her own healthy realizations

    Xing fingers & toes!
  8. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Sounds hopeful, Nancy. Each baby step in the right direction is a source of optimism. I believe she can make it, too. Hugs DDD
  9. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Sounds like she is back on the right track. Lots of people do MUCH better in college when they are using their own $$ to pay for classes than when they are being helped with the cost. Retention studies done at the local 4 yr univ show that those who have invested their own hard earned cash into classes for at least 1-2 semesters (we don't have quarters) are FAR more likely to work hard to stay in school than those who have it all paid for by family or even by grants and scholarships and loans. Those are not seen as money they worked hard for, so it is easier to blow it off. My mom was on the retention study committee for a number of years and I earned extra $$ by typing the reports and entering the data from the study (It went on over a number of years.)
  10. Tiredof33

    Tiredof33 Active Member

    Thanks, we do need some good news!!! I think the job and classes will keep her busy. It's wonderful to see her trying to better her life, and she is actually paying for it herself!