If you could just lend a little bit of a good thought...

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by hearts and roses, Jan 2, 2010.

  1. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    difficult child is cycling...she's got that frenetic energy, she's moody, crying, lashing out, mean, expecting the worst and just crazy thinking. She's leaving away messages on facebook similar to the kind I used to find on AIM. She upset with her 'old man boyfriend', who has been sweet as pie all through the holidays. It's like it's too perfect so she has to conjure up some bad doo-doo.

    I wasn't going to post about this for fear of jinxing it, but difficult child got a new job. It's a great opportunity. She is being hired as a long term temporary position for an insurance company and she will be doing data entry and filing, which is what she loves. It's an opportunity for her to experience the real world, save some money, perhaps get herself into a better car by summer. She got this job through her 'old man's' sister who works there and in fact, started in the same position offered to difficult child. She's given her current employer her notice and since they can't offer her any more hours or more money, she happy to leave. It's a go nowhere job, so I'm also happy she's leaving.

    But now she's cycling.

    I am worried...I keep throwing positive energy out there to counter act my worries. Can you just take a moment to throw up a positive thought too? Thanks. I'm going to encourage her to see her Dr this week and perhaps go on a low dose antidepressant. I think it would help her.
     
  2. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE

    Jo, everything I've read here says that you don't want someone with BiPolar (BP) to have a stimulant or an AD until they are at a therapeutic level of a mood stabilizer first. Has she tried them in the past?

    What you've described reminds me a lot of anxiety- has she ever been treated for that with any success?

    Big hugs. I just want to throw up my hands and scream when our kids get so anxious they sabotage themselves.

    Sending good thoughts.

    Suz
     
  3. ML

    ML Guest

    I'm sending out positive thoughts to the universe and saying a few prayers as well. Hugs, ML
     
  4. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Sending many calming thoughts.
     
  5. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    Sending up vibes that difficult child levels off and starts the new job and experiences much success.
     
  6. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE

    I hope today is better, Jo.

    Hugs,
    Suz
     
  7. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    Hope she will stabilize soon, Jo.
     
  8. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Jo

    ((hugs))

    I hope she stabilizes soon. Maybe the holidays brought it to a head and she'll begin to get it together again now that they're past. So hard to watch. :(
     
  9. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    I took a few moments with difficult child today and just asked her how she was doing. She started to tear up and said she didn't know. I asked her if she was nervous or feeling, antsy? She said a little bit and she can't describe how she feels other than paranoid.

    She has been on a very low dose of celexa in the past with success, when she takes it. She did not do well at all with a mood stabilizer, however, risperdal helped her remain calmer in most anxious situations for what it's worth. She hates taking medications, pretty much will not take them. I didn't push it, but I did suggest she give it some thought, even if it's just to get through the next couple of months till she's settled at her job, etc. She said she'd think about it but she didn't think it would be a good idea to start a medication while starting a new job. "Fair enough", I said, "just keep it in the back of your mind, especially if you begin to feel overwhelmed."

    It was nice to be able to talk with her about her mood disorder without her getting all po'ed and yelling. I was able to explain to her about her cycling and how it's perceived by me and ask her how it's perceived by her and she was honest. She clearly felt a bit better after we talked (outside in the blistering cold wind snow storm thingy we had today).

    Thank you for the positive thoughts and prayers. Tomorrow she begins training at her new job and then Tues/Thurs are her last days at the old job. Just hanging on to those positive vibes!
     
  10. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Jo

    While she is open to information and input.......this is the point where I found easy to understand info about Nichole's dxes for her to read. All I did was give it to her and told her it might help her understand what she was going thru and why. I left it at that. Didn't push. To my surprise Nichole did read thru it and then actively sought more information. It made a huge difference for her. And it made her more receptive to taking her medications.

    Just a thought. Glad the two of you were able to have a real conversation about it. :) Sometimes those baby steps can actually be huge.

    ((hugs))
     
  11. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Thanks Lisa. You know I've always been met with strong resistance when trying to explain or help her understand her diagnosis. Maybe now would be a good time to give her something to read.

    Of course, it has to be just the right tone and level of information for her to process. In the past, she's always been hyper senstive to feeling like we were telling her 'there is something wrong with you' and I don't want to open up that can of worms - shivers down my spine.

    Instead I would just like it to be informational in a 'lots of people deal with this issue' sort of way. Any suggestions?

    I mean, she definitely has BiPolar (BP), but as she's gotten older, the signs of an oncoming cycle are more clear [to us] but I think for her it's confusing. And also, when she's cycling, it seems that either we're less inclined to react or she gets over it faster or it's simply less sever - or - maybe all three. I think that by the time she was truly diagnosed with actual BiPolar (BP) she had lost her patience with the medications and was beginning to drink and use pot as a form of self medicating, which made it difficult for the medications to work properly so it became a big mess. Her impression of medications is not a good one so she's hesitant to try them again. Her Dr has suggested it several times in the past year, but difficult child always says no.

    And on top of the BiPolar (BP), her hormones really do effect her A LOT so that is another consideration. Rather than just drop something in her lap, I'd like to be able to find something that is easy to understand and perhaps will provoke her enough to ask questions, like Nichole did. I will try and find something that is suitable for her to review. Thanks for mentioning it.
     
  12. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Janet was a huge help in finding easy to understand websites for Nichole. I'll have to try and search for them this afternoon and see if I can find some of them again. One was a really good sight with youngish people explaining what they were going through and how they felt. That was one that really struck a chord with Nichole. I think it made a huge difference to her to actually see that there were others that were going thru much of the same things she was having problems with. She liked it too because medical terms were kept at a minimum making it much easier for her to understand what they were saying.

    Wish I could remember the name of that one. Maybe Nichole will. I can ask her when she comes home from work.

    I had them all bookmarked but that computer bit the dust last year. ugh
     
  13. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Just sending some good thoughts. Sounds like she's a lot more mature about it, and it sounds like you both are at least open to communication. That in itself is HUGE compared to where she used to be. Wishing for the best.

    Hugs
     
  14. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

  15. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Thank you Janet!!!!
     
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