Im sorry if I offended anyone, what did I say wrong?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Confused, Jan 25, 2014.

  1. Confused

    Confused Guest

    I got a private message from someone and I am lost on what I said wrong? Im sorry if I offended anyone.. I always pray for all you and wish you the best and send hugs and try to give advice like video tape their meltdowns, support groups, therapy animals and that Im here to listen and what I have gone thru. Where did I say I wouldn't support and protect my kids? I do, and I am trying to get my son to take his medications the DR prescribed although they have side effects of his tummy upset ..(higher dosage he more irritable and violent-) just so he can function and pass school and mainly calm down! You take a 7 year old who is stronger than most his age, even more strong when in a rage and what am I suppose to do? Attempt to sit on him and shove the medications down his throat? Some have told me that..would u do that?

    My daughter is passing school, very active in many activities, eating, is not depressed but is extremely quite since kinder. Now, I do constantly check on them to make sure to bring things up, check if they are crying out for help,talking with doctors as we speak. Some of you said maybe not social anxiety but autism spectrum for her... I do see this and am talking to doctors ... I do believe in God but sometimes when a lot happens as Im sure some do have questions like why them? Why? Thats NORMAL for some, ecsp me!!!! I have nothing against anyone's religion so again sorry if I offended any of you.

    I am truly sorry for anything anyone took offense to, I will no longer come here. I get blasted enough blamed for enough, and have and do not need it here. This place was a slice of heaven for me, help that I have never gotten until recently from their doctors and even family still says its me.. well my grandpa...I will never give up on my kids and will do anything I can for them forever. They are my life

    Hugs to all and pray all your dreams come true...


    Theres no need for an update... So I will review all my posts to see what I have said wrong and you may delete my username/threads. Just give me 24 hours to review them all before you delete them please if I am allowed. Thank and sorry for any trouble I have caused.
     
  2. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    (((Confused))) 'm not aware of any issue with your posts. If someone is harassing you, you can report the member. Use the report function in the private message.
     
  3. runawaybunny

    runawaybunny Administrator Staff Member

    No one has ever reported any of your posts. If someone is bullying you via private messages please report the message to the mods or start a private conversation with me.
     
  4. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Don't run away...please! We are a wonderful diverse group and I, for one, have never seen a trace of offensive posting from you. Just remember that some members have "issues" and sometimes they do not use good judgement. Please share with runawaybunny so she can assure that we all remain in harmony. You would be missed so many of us. Hugs DDD
     
  5. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Yikes, I just lost my well thought out post to you. Please don't run away. Let runaway bunny track the problem. I have never read an offensive word in any of your posts and I'm guessing that whoever sent you a PM is the one in a thousand members who might not be healthy right now and wrongly vented. Hang in with us as we don't like losing family members. Sorry for the problem. Hugs DDD
     
  6. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Third attempt to send a post...still didn't go through. Sending support and hugs. DDD
     
  7. ThreeShadows

    ThreeShadows Quid me anxia?

    Please don't leave! Report that message! You have every right to be supported and heard on this board.
     
  8. Confused

    Confused Guest

    Thank you all but I am going to stay away. A long time ago another member and I disagreed on something but we talked and she is just a wonderful person ( she always was/is)and I DO see what I said in that issue. But this one, I really got hurt and sad what the member thought of me , and what was said just blew me away because Im not that way... and it took me by surprise because I am dumbfounded! And no, I will not report that person because they need support for themselves and their family too. I agree many need help and may say things or read into things but its ok. This is my life, I try to make friends, or at least great acquaintances, but, in the end, I know it was not meant to be. Sometimes I get blamed even when I really didnt say or do anything, but its ok. Yes, I know my words dont come out right, honestly I am not a brilliant person nor do I have a great vocabulary. But I only view my opinions on my situations alone. I honestly do not see what I said to this person-

    but either way- I am sorry, you know who you are and I do care about everyone here, including you. Im sorry you think that of me and Im sorry to have offended you.
     
  9. Malika

    Malika Well-Known Member

    That's a shame, Confused. I personally would think it better to address this issue with this person (who represents nobody but herself) and carry on allowing yourself the support and information that is to be found here. You must do as you see fit. I for one will be sad not to hear more news of you (and have always found your messages supportive and gentle). Hugs.
     
  10. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Please don't go away because of one person. You have never said anything offensive to anybody.

    Many hugs!!!
     
  11. BackintheSaddle

    BackintheSaddle Active Member

    that's awful, confused.....think of it this way...if you don't report the person, they're likely to do it again to someone else!!! you'd be protecting someone else down the road from that abuse...don't allow that person to abuse you like that..it's inappropriate and I'm sorry that happened to you...we are all 'injured' souls looking for a safe place to figure this out and that person has no right to do that to anyone! even if you don't agree with someone's post, that's no excuse for attacking them personally!....thanks for letting us know and please do stand up for yourself...you deserve to be here just as much as I do! (or anyone!)
     
  12. Confused

    Confused Guest

    Oh Ok, I re-read the message and It seems as if I offended the person by supposedly not helping someone else -by saying the wrong thing or advice to them and not helping them while they were crying out for help?? Im still lost and confused about the meaning of the op message.. Its just what I was called was shocking...and I thought it was geared towards my kids... sorry if I ever gave bad advice...I understand any of us, incl me, can take something the wrong way, I understand that, and want to be told if I offended them, I can handle that,let me know how hurt or offended you were by me, and point out to what I said, direct me to what it was please. I am far from perfect but never would I never ignore or trash someone crying out for help.. I will tell them what I have gone thru, how I feel if I were in that situation not what they should definitely do, gee wiz I want to apologize for it but I dont know what I said to that person! But to be called what I was called? I mean, I get beat up by my son at times and had something bad happen to me many years ago but just wow. Wow, Id rather be torched alive.

    Again , I want NOTHING done to this person, - I just wish I knew who I said this wrong thing to and what I said! Or didn't say! Please, forgive me! I am sorry to the other person as well, please, If I didnt help you or said the wrong thing to you, I never meant to and I hope you are ok as well as your family. I wish you would of let me know who you are.
     
  13. runawaybunny

    runawaybunny Administrator Staff Member

    There is an ignore function here which is very very effective. Put the member that was hurtful on your ignore list and they can't message you and their posts will not exist.

    My suggestion is that you take back control from the person that has hurt you and "ignore" the member that has upset you. Pooofff... they will simply disappear.
     
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  14. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Confused...apparently that person is the only one who thought so. i think it was wrong of her to send you that sort of private message, for what it is worth.

    None of us always say the right thing. I'm a big "her foot's in her mouth" person...lol :)

    I'd do what runaway says, put her on ignore, and stay. We like you :)
     
  15. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    None of here are professional or credentialed, confused. We do the best we can to guide, support and help each other as parents/caregivers to difficult children. Nothing more, nothing less. I know that you post from the heart and give the best you have to offer. You have nothing to be sorry about. We have a saying here for when the advice won't work for a given member's situation: take what you can use and leave the rest.

    I am very concerned that someone took it upon themselves to confront about a post. I imagine that member's public persona does not match the private tongue lashing you receive. By doing this, you've been abused. And our community suffers because this member causes mistrust between members.
     
  16. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Confused please dont leave.

    Heavens if someone got mad at me for everything I have ever posted...or not posted, I would be in so much trouble. All the members here on the board are under no obligation to give anyone advice. We post to other people when we want to do so. You should not feel like you have to post in any certain way. Variety is what helps us.

    Im so sorry someone upset you. I have had situations where people took what I have said the wrong way too. All over the internet. The written word just doesnt convey what we mean at times. You are a valuable member here so dont go anywhere!!!!
     
  17. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Confused-I hope you stay! I've never seen you post something offensive. I like the idea of putting the person on your ignore list. You have a right not to be attacked in a pm (or anywhere) and it sounds more a statement of the person sending the pm. Sending some gentle hugs your way.
     
  18. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Please don't go! You have not been offensive. If the person could not even give you specifics in a way that made sense, so that you understood what the problem is and why it was a problem, whatever is going on is THEIR problem, NOT YOURS!

    If this was a real issue, more than one person would have said something, or else a moderator or runawaybunny would have come to you. Otherwise, the person is just wrong to say whatever it was. You are a valuable and valued member of this community, this family. Please do not let this complaint chase you away. Ignore the person as her opinion of you is CLEARLY not your business and clearly NOT the opinion of the rest of us here. Why deprive yourself of the support and caring here because of one person, or deprive the rest of us of your support and caring when we obviously do not agree with that person?

    trust me, if we agreed, more than one person would have said something to you.
     
  19. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    I am pretty sure at some point I have or will say something that will be taken the wrong way. None of are perfect, none of us are doctors, and all of us are struggling to put one foot in front of the other. I don't always see eye to eye on every post. I agree with others to ignore them and just keep coming back. Your input might just be what someone else needs to hear.
     
  20. Loony Smurf

    Loony Smurf Member

    Sorry to hear someone doesn't agree with something you said. But there's an old saying: you can please some of the people all of the time, all of the people some of the time, but you can't please all the people all the time. Disagreements are going to happen. Sometimes people get offended through no fault of our own. You meant no offense or disrespect, it's on that person for choosing to take offense where none was intended.

    Also to always keep in the back of your mind, our children aren't the only ones who have various issues. There are many an adult difficult child, even on here. Many of the issues kids from folks on here have a genetic factor. Also, sometimes we get so caught up in being attacked all of the time and so accustomed to the malice in our lives that we start seeing it where it doesn't really exist. It's entirely possible that this person just simply assumed it was meant that way simply because it was possible to twist it that way because that's what they are used to people treating her like.

    There are many very unique and strong personalities on this board. For the most part they are helpful and supportive and understanding. You didnt intend any harm in what you said. I believe you have much to offer the community, each of our older most helpful members started here as a needy person looking for help and support. If you leave you take your insight and kindness and support with you and leave us with the non-helpful non-kind person.

    I hope you can look objectively at the issue and find the confidence to realize you are a worthwhile member and people want you to stay. There will always be Someone who doesn't like you for one reason or another, we all have them. That doesn't mean you have to go away.

    ((hugs)) for your hurt feelings, support for your decision.

    From someone who knows how it feels to want to leave when attacked. Stand up for yourself, you are worth it.:thumbsup:
     
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