Is it possible...

[Fran]

TM, I think you are wise.
Mom should have the doctor keep brother or s i l or friend on the phone as dr. talks to your mom so that everyone is on the same page.

We found that it was best to have one person be the designated information gatherer so that we didn't have a lot of fractured info. Of course, our situation although similar is different.

Being sucked in one step at a time is more likely than you jumping in with both feet. Keep a clear vision of what you will allow yourself to do or not do is a good way to not get sucked in. You are pretty good about boundaries so you will be able to handle this even if it is difficult.

My mom wouldn't hear of anything we suggested for her safety and well being until she got sick enough to be scared to be alone. Now she cooperates much more readily.

 

[DammitJanet]

Im going to make one point that everyone should be aware of in case you dont know about it...and you should check it out in your various states. I know it is true in many states. If an elderly relative is found to need care and APS gets involved, you as the nearest relative can be called upon to take care of them if they deem it fit. This most notably happens with parent and child but it can be sibling to sibling. Not only did this happen to me, and I have seen the statute in writing, but I know of other people it happened to including my therapists mother.

 

[tiredmommy]

Thanks, Janet. My mom is living in Canada while I'm in the States.