difficult child has been playing with a girl from the next neighborhood. He and L have been trying to avoid another girl E and I told them that when E is around they are to include her in whatever they are doing so they have been tolerating her.
L is 10 years old which really surprised me, she is very mature and I really thought she was closer to difficult child's age. E is about 12 years old.
The other day, difficult child comes home and tells me that E attacked L. He knew E was angry so was trying to get L away from the area but before he could explain, E stated she felt like jumping someone and choose L. When difficult child tried to pull E away from L, E bit difficult child. difficult child took L home (it was her supper time anyway) and came home himself.
When L came back after supper, I called her mom. She said L had not said a word. I asked her if she knew E or E's mom since I did not. I asked if E's mom would be open to a visit or how she would like to handle this. She told me she should would first talk to L and then get back to me.
We have been busy all weekend and have not had a chance yet to touch base again. Yesterday afternoon, E came over while difficult child was working on preparing a flower bed for me. I asked difficult child if I should say anything to her and he said "no". She soon left but was back shortly with a very small bucket (smaller than an ice cream pail) that had a turtle in it. She showed me the turtle and I told her that she needs to take it out of the bucket soon since it needs to be able to move around.
I then warned her to be careful of snapping turtles along the lake and stream that they play at. We have seen some huge ones nearby. She told me that she knew all about snapping turtles, she has seen a lot of them. So, I asked her, "Is that where you learned to bite?" She looked at me questionably. I said, "difficult child came home with bite marks on his arm the other day. Did you learn to bite from snapping turtles?" "No", she replied, "I learned to bite from my little brother."
I told her that in this neighborhood, kids do not physically fight and if she is angry at someone, she is to use her words or ask an adult for help.
difficult child was a little ways away working on the flower bed. He text me with, "What? Is that all? I thought you were going to really yell at her!"
There may be a reason difficult child and L and other neighborhood kids are avoiding E. She is mean. I will keep an eye out for what she is doing when involved with difficult child and let other parents know if difficult child tells me any harm to their kids. I think if she knows that as a neighborhood this behavior will not be tolerated than she will take more care of how she behaves with the other kids.
She went to another neighbor's house to see if H would play. She told him she was bored and he just shut the door in her face. His mom did talk to him and told him that no matter how mean E is, he is not to shut the door in her face. She is bored and is looking for kids to play with. We will let her get involved in the neighborhood play as long as she is respectful. If she harms anyone, then she will be grounded from seeing our kids for awhile. (I did this with another kid in the neighborhood who attacked difficult child and the next day came to play. I told him that I didn't think the two of them knew how to play well together and needed a week to think about how to treat each other before playing again).
L is 10 years old which really surprised me, she is very mature and I really thought she was closer to difficult child's age. E is about 12 years old.
The other day, difficult child comes home and tells me that E attacked L. He knew E was angry so was trying to get L away from the area but before he could explain, E stated she felt like jumping someone and choose L. When difficult child tried to pull E away from L, E bit difficult child. difficult child took L home (it was her supper time anyway) and came home himself.
When L came back after supper, I called her mom. She said L had not said a word. I asked her if she knew E or E's mom since I did not. I asked if E's mom would be open to a visit or how she would like to handle this. She told me she should would first talk to L and then get back to me.
We have been busy all weekend and have not had a chance yet to touch base again. Yesterday afternoon, E came over while difficult child was working on preparing a flower bed for me. I asked difficult child if I should say anything to her and he said "no". She soon left but was back shortly with a very small bucket (smaller than an ice cream pail) that had a turtle in it. She showed me the turtle and I told her that she needs to take it out of the bucket soon since it needs to be able to move around.
I then warned her to be careful of snapping turtles along the lake and stream that they play at. We have seen some huge ones nearby. She told me that she knew all about snapping turtles, she has seen a lot of them. So, I asked her, "Is that where you learned to bite?" She looked at me questionably. I said, "difficult child came home with bite marks on his arm the other day. Did you learn to bite from snapping turtles?" "No", she replied, "I learned to bite from my little brother."
I told her that in this neighborhood, kids do not physically fight and if she is angry at someone, she is to use her words or ask an adult for help.
difficult child was a little ways away working on the flower bed. He text me with, "What? Is that all? I thought you were going to really yell at her!"
There may be a reason difficult child and L and other neighborhood kids are avoiding E. She is mean. I will keep an eye out for what she is doing when involved with difficult child and let other parents know if difficult child tells me any harm to their kids. I think if she knows that as a neighborhood this behavior will not be tolerated than she will take more care of how she behaves with the other kids.
She went to another neighbor's house to see if H would play. She told him she was bored and he just shut the door in her face. His mom did talk to him and told him that no matter how mean E is, he is not to shut the door in her face. She is bored and is looking for kids to play with. We will let her get involved in the neighborhood play as long as she is respectful. If she harms anyone, then she will be grounded from seeing our kids for awhile. (I did this with another kid in the neighborhood who attacked difficult child and the next day came to play. I told him that I didn't think the two of them knew how to play well together and needed a week to think about how to treat each other before playing again).