Let me off this difficult child train.

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by DazedandConfused, Oct 11, 2007.

  1. DazedandConfused

    DazedandConfused Active Member

    Daughter was removed from the cross country team today. To explain would be require much than I can write at the moment. First off, I'm exhausted from working. Thursday is my busiest day. Classes and sometimes two all day all long with only one break for lunch. Every spare moment left was spent texting with a very distraught Daughter and speaking with the Asst. Coach (Head coach left/fired at the beginning of the season)on the phone.

    In short, she has been experiencing significant fall out from the removal of ANOTHER kid on the team who had been harassing her for months. He was verbally warned to stop. He did until one day, right after my Step-father died (her grandfather) he just said some horrible things to her. I had had enough and emailed the asst coach and cc'd the athletic director and principal (to make sure something was done)to tell them to make good on the threat to remove this kid. :sword:

    Well, anyway, again to make a long story very short, many on the team turned on her. And Daughter, being so reactive, just went off yesterday after someone had messed with her backpack at a race and her ipod headphones went missing (later found). One girl, a former good friend, lead the pack in getting the team to blame her about this other kid being removed. Blame me, I was the one who made a fuss. Apparently, former good friend was a friend of the harasser.

    Anyway, she threatened to "punch" this girl in the face. And she took an aggressive stance and lunged at this girl (who had quit the team earlier in the day, why she was there at the race, I don't know)because the girl kept making snide remarks at Daughter. This girl was also been running her mouth in one of the classes they share, really getting Daughter ramped up.

    So Asst. Coach left me a voice mail letting me know that she regretted it, but had to remove daughter from team because this situation was getting out of control. I call daughter (at lunch on her phone) to tell her because I know if coach tells her she's going to lose it completely. So, all the while I have classes, I'm trying to talk daughter through it with text messages. Then, she calls me sobbing and wanting to beg the coach to be back on the team. I know that would be a mistake. I just kept encouraging her that she will survive and be okay.

    Anyway, I told her to move on. And she's accepted the removal.But, THANK GOODNESS, she has a psychiatrist appointment on Saturday. She's on no medications right now, but I'm going to ask to try a new AD for her. She took wellbutrin xl with good results for a couple of years, but then it stopped working as some medications do. I'm also thinking about looking into anger management for her. Actually, she was the one who thought she might need it, then I thought, "why not?" She needs one for teens though.

    Honestly, I CAN'T wait until she's out of high school. Now, she's getting ready to try out for soccer. I'm very nervous about that. But, on the other hand, she has brought up her grades because it's required to participate in sports.

    I get so tired of being a parent. But, I'm getting real good at texting.
  2. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I think the fact that you believe she has accepted the removal already is pretty darn good - especially given that it has been less than 24 hours! I would be pretty proud of her turnaround to try out for something else.

    It is good that she has an appointment this weekend. You never know, she may just need to voice some opinions and feelings.

    As a fellow mother of a teem daughter, my texting skills have gotten really good as well :geek: !!!!

  3. SearchingForRainbows

    SearchingForRainbows Active Member

    I agree with Sharon. I think it is really good that she has accepted the removal from the cross country team so soon. I also think that it is great that she is trying out for soccer. It sounds like she is determined to be involved in sports and by bringing up her grades it shows that when she wants something enough, she'll do what she has to do to get it. This can be a good life skill. I'm also glad that she has a psychiatrist appointment.

    I understand how you feel about being tired of being a parent!!! Sorry I don't have any great words of wisdom for you. I think I'm basically in survival mode this morning. WFEN