BusynMember
Well-Known Member
My son is 31 and has inherited everything I have...lucky him . His wife used to be very supportive of his problems, but since she had my grandson, she has not. She has put her entire life into the baby and rarely even allows him time with his son (I just found this out and it is breaking my heart). She doesn't really want OUR family to be alone with the child either as she believes that mental illness is NOT inherited, but the result of "bad parenting." So, in other words, my son has his issues because of how he was parented. But I digress:
My son has serious social anxiety and is not a fighter. If they divorce, which is possible, he is terrified of being alone and afraid he'll never see his son much (I'm afraid I won't see our grandson either...anyone know about grandparents rights?)
They had gone to marriage counseling, but he said it made things worse with wife pulling away from him even more and saying "I can't be that person I used to be." He called me in a very sad mood, kind of asking for advice, but I don't really have any. His wife isn't a bad person, but she can be very distant and I certainly can't talk to her about anything.
I don't know what words to tell my son. Although she wasn't like this before, she now wants him to "buck up" and "get over it" when he has his panic attacks, etc. I understand her point of view, but I also know one can't just chose to "get over it."
My son is in treatment. I hate to tell him this, but I think his marriage is heading for divorce, which will totally destroy any self-esteem he has. She doesn't seem willing to work on their problems. Tonight he is going to confront her about heredity and his problems and how his son will not have problems if he has more to do with raising him. He will either have problems or he won't have problems. I don't expect a good outcome.
We saw the grandchild last weekend at my daughter's house and, while playing with him, he dumped over some soda on the floor. Nobody cared, but she over-reacted and blamed us for "playing with him by the drink." I hadn't even seen the drink, but I don't think it's a blame thing. Nobody was angry at my grandson...children do this.
He seems so distressed. I don't have any answers. I knew we were not being allowed to see grandson in a normal way and am anxiously awaiting my DAUGHTER to have a child because I'm not going to be allowed to be close to this grandchild. It doesn't help that I live three hours away and am never invited over.
Anything you can help me say to my son when he calls me back? Any advice to give him? He feels like an outsider in the family, has told his wife, and she doeesn't care...
My son has serious social anxiety and is not a fighter. If they divorce, which is possible, he is terrified of being alone and afraid he'll never see his son much (I'm afraid I won't see our grandson either...anyone know about grandparents rights?)
They had gone to marriage counseling, but he said it made things worse with wife pulling away from him even more and saying "I can't be that person I used to be." He called me in a very sad mood, kind of asking for advice, but I don't really have any. His wife isn't a bad person, but she can be very distant and I certainly can't talk to her about anything.
I don't know what words to tell my son. Although she wasn't like this before, she now wants him to "buck up" and "get over it" when he has his panic attacks, etc. I understand her point of view, but I also know one can't just chose to "get over it."
My son is in treatment. I hate to tell him this, but I think his marriage is heading for divorce, which will totally destroy any self-esteem he has. She doesn't seem willing to work on their problems. Tonight he is going to confront her about heredity and his problems and how his son will not have problems if he has more to do with raising him. He will either have problems or he won't have problems. I don't expect a good outcome.
We saw the grandchild last weekend at my daughter's house and, while playing with him, he dumped over some soda on the floor. Nobody cared, but she over-reacted and blamed us for "playing with him by the drink." I hadn't even seen the drink, but I don't think it's a blame thing. Nobody was angry at my grandson...children do this.
He seems so distressed. I don't have any answers. I knew we were not being allowed to see grandson in a normal way and am anxiously awaiting my DAUGHTER to have a child because I'm not going to be allowed to be close to this grandchild. It doesn't help that I live three hours away and am never invited over.
Anything you can help me say to my son when he calls me back? Any advice to give him? He feels like an outsider in the family, has told his wife, and she doeesn't care...