Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by forkeeps251, Mar 19, 2012.

  1. forkeeps251

    forkeeps251 Member

    Quick background: My difficult child started Kindergarten this past year. It has been h*ll. We started the process of getting difficult child evaluated back in September. He has been to play therapy, has had two assessments done by a private psychologist and a school psychologist, both PhD's, and both recommend the same thing: that we seek medication for (in my opinion extreme) ADHD. We live in a LARGE metropolitan area and are going through a LARGE children's hospital and physicians network for all this. difficult child's pediatrition will not perscribe medication for ADHD. His main problems are speech and language delays, ADHD, anxiety, stress, depression (I think all these are probably related to the ADHD). We will probably be having him assessed for Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) pretty soon. Anyway, all this is just background and not really why I'm writting...

    The "big day" is supposed to be tomorrow, where we FINALLY after six months (including play therapy and assessments) get to see a psychiatrist to get a perscription for medication to treat his ADHD. I made this appointment in December... nearly 4 months ago. That's how long it takes to get in. Well, I never received the paperwork in the mail (I called February 20th to confirm this, and they confirmed it and said the paperwork would come in the mail). So I called this morning, and here is what she said:

    "We show you called on the 20th and canceled and did not wish to reschedule"


    I am so mad. SO FREAKING MAD!!! She said she received an email from the receptionist saying that I had called the front desk and canceled, with no wish to reschedule. She also told me later on in the conversation that "many people" had called and canceled at that point and that she didn't think anything of it. I'm betting what happened is that the receptionist wrote my name down as she was taking notes on who called, and then it got placed with someone who called before or after me that DID wish to schedule.

    She said that she probably wouldn't be able to get me tomorrow, but maybe in a few weeks at the "first avaliable time" the psychiatrist has. She hasn't called me back yet. She said I might after to go to a different office... I told her I didn't care if I had to go to Timbuktu, I was desperate. I told her I've been counting down the days, that my son was on the verge of expulsion, and I was desperate for help. I was almost crying to her over the phone.

    She hasn't called me back yet. This is totally their screw up.

    Just a few weeks ago they called me from school. He was sent up (again) to the principal's office, and when he got there, instead of going in the office he tried running out the door!! RUNNING OUT OF SCHOOL! HE IS SIX!! Had there not been someone where, what could have happened? The principal though, was there, and literally had to carry him back into the office, where he had a complete MELTDOWN. They called me to come get him, and I could hear him crying and screaming hysterically in the background. In my memory I've never heard him that distraught. It all started when someone kicked his pencil box or something. I think he hit the kid, and then was sent to the principal, and then it went down hill from there. I'm really worried about him. I'm not to the point yet where I'm worried that he will seriously hurt himself or someone else, but I've been called TWICE recently to come get him from school. I.AM.DESPERATE.

    After losing my appointment tomorrow I'm feeling 100% defeated. I'm scared to say that I think it is an emergency because I don't really know what that constitutes. I mean it isn't like he needs a straightjaket or is putting a knife to his wrist or anything, but I feel like he is a ticking time bomb. Unfortunantly to me what seems like a crisis probably isn't to the doctors. The receptionist says take him to the ER if it is an emergency, but it isn't THAT type of an emergency. The problem is that things just keep progressing downhill. What's next?

    UPDATE: They just called and they have squeezed me in on April 5th. I'm trying to remain calm. Deep breaths.
  2. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    :hugs: Oh, hon. I know, I know. Jett was diagnosis'd with severe ADHD... But we found out that the Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) and anxiety was creating more of the symptoms than anything. Also we're waiting on the school - we're having him tested for Auditory Processing Disorders (APD). His ADHD is actually mild...
    I'm hoping they can get you in faster, and when you are there DEMAND a follow up in a couple weeks, because it's possible you may have to try several medications before you find one that works.

    More :hugs:. LOTS of them.
  3. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Air-heads for support staff.
    A raft of "cancel and no re-books? At a major center?
    Not a hope. They might get one or two of those a day... because people DO join more than one queue (we've done that) and when they get in somewhere else, they cancel.
    I think they had a switchboard going crazy, and a receptionist who dropped the ball, and it won't be just you who is waiting for paperwork that hasn't come...

    Are they still sending out the paperwork?
  4. forkeeps251

    forkeeps251 Member

    Yes, they are still sending the paperwork and and we have a new appointment on the 5th. Not toooo bad, but this morning it just seemed like more than my nerves could take. They may not consider it an emergency, but my son is sufferening and it seems like there is just one delay after another. I'm tired and frustrated.

    The good news is that we didn't have any calls from the school today. We just finished spring break and it seems like after a small break he goes back to school recharged and ready to do a good job, so maybe we will be fine until the 5th. Fingers crossed.
  5. soapbox

    soapbox Member

    Given that you have an "extra" two weeks...

    The whole "things are better after a break from school" thing is SO familiar.
    We live that. Breathe it. Even now, when we have the right accommodations etc., there is still a definite decline from "after break" to "before next break".

    Which lends credence to the "fatigue factor". (Doctors don't generally see this or want to, but... some do)

    Have you done up a parent report?
    If not, do it. Including things like the impact just before and just after school breaks.
    It will help you be better prepared for the appointment.

    I don't remember what it is called on Site Help and Resources... I usually just look for a recent post by susiestar, because the link is on her signature.
  6. Ktllc

    Ktllc New Member

    :consoling:Big hugs. The wait can be excrutiating. I am dreading Kindergarten next year....
    Does he have an IEP? 'cause ultimately, you don't need a medical diagnosis to obtain an IEP and accomodations.
    Is your school cooperative or not at all?
    Try to hang in there until your appointement, but keep in mind: there are probably no magic bullet to "save" you from your difficult child's issues. Even after the appointment, it might be a long process. But at least you'll be one step ahead than you are today. I just don't want you to be disappointed. I have been disappointed so many times by those appointments...
    I wish I could give you more advise. All I can do is send my support and understanding.
  7. Snoopy

    Snoopy New Member

    forkeeps251...I'm new to this board but I'd like to share some info with you if I could. I've yet to post an introduction but another mom private messaged me a few weeks ago regarding a comment I had made to yet another mom. She'd asked me what interventions we'd done for our daughter (also 6 years old and in Kindergarten). I wrote her a very long private message and tried to send it to her yesterday but it wouldn't send. If you'd like I can forward it to you...if you are interested. I'll probably need to send it in parts. While it sounds as though your son's challenges are a bit different than our daughter's, the modalities we've done and are doing would most definitely benefit your son. I'm happy to share this with anyone else who is interested as well. I'm not posting it here because I understand that we aren't supposed to post specifics on this board (only via private message). I'm also happy to visit by phone with anyone who wants more info. A group of members of two different yahoo groups saved my family and I want to pass this stuff along to anyone else who might benefit. Let me know if you like me to send this info via private message.
  8. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Snoopy -
    How much detail we post depends on the person and the situation...
    We do NOT post things like Dr. and clinic names, school names, etc. - way too identifying.
    But... if we feel comfortable doing so, we are welcome to share specific treatments, concepts, ideas, etc....
    Not just by PM, but on the board.
  9. forkeeps251

    forkeeps251 Member

    Soapbox - I'm about to look it up right now.

    Ktllc - I know I shouldn't expect too much, but I can't help but hope. I'll be thrilled if it just helps him enough to keep him out of the principals office for right now. He does have an IEP, is now in resource class a few times a week, in addition to speech, and has a BIP. The school has actually been great, at least compared to a lot of complaints that I have heard. While I don't think they are fully equiped to deal with everything he is going through, they really do seem to be trying to help, and they seem to like him. The school has been MUCH more proactive that the doctors office has been.

    Snoopy - I'd love to hear what you have to say! Please PM me, I'm always interested in whatever help I can get.

    On the plus side, the "break" seems to have worked because he had a GOOD day today at school!!!
  10. Snoopy

    Snoopy New Member

    InsaneCdn...thank you for response. The things we've done are modalities that are not well known but have been incredibly healing for my daughter. We quickly figured out that the traditional medical and mental health community had practically zero ability to help us. As I understood it, her condition could be managed but not "cured". I just couldn't live with that so I began searching off the grid so to speak. For 3 of the interventions, I wrote about the modality and who we specifically used...and for one modality, the other practitioners that I know of. I didn't include the therapist who actually diagnosed my daughter but I'm happy to share his name. So should I post this info privately? Again, I'm happy to share with anyone and everyone!
  11. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    "who you used" stays in PMs.

    "what you did/used/followed... " is fine to share if you wish to...
  12. Snoopy

    Snoopy New Member

    forkeeps251...let me see what InsaneCdn says and I'll either post it here or message you privately.
  13. Snoopy

    Snoopy New Member

    For right now, I'll just private message you, forkeeps251. I can't take the time to censor my message at this moment. Thanks for the clarification, InsaneCdn. Let me know if you want the full message as well.
  14. Snoopy

    Snoopy New Member

  15. Snoopy

    Snoopy New Member

    Ack! How do I private message? I clicked on your name but it doesn't give me an option to PM. Sorry I'm making this difficult.
  16. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Hmmm... I can PM either one of you (I composed but did not send), so... I'm not sure why you have a problem. Can you send a test msg to me and see if that works - i.e. if forkeep's settings are different?
  17. Snoopy

    Snoopy New Member

    I'm on a mobile device so maybe that's why. Let me get on my laptop.
  18. Snoopy

    Snoopy New Member

    I think I've got it figured out! Thanks! We'll see if she gets it. :)
  19. forkeeps251

    forkeeps251 Member

    I got it, I'm reading through it now! Thanks!
  20. Snoopy

    Snoopy New Member

    Oh good. Glad you received it. As you can see my situation is different than yours but the therapies cover the issue of ADHD as well as a host of other diagnoses. Let me know if you have specific questions. I know it's a lot of info to absorb.