O Yeah? You Take difficult child for a Week!

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by DaisyFace, Apr 20, 2010.

  1. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    How many times have we all joked and commisserated about this? How many times have we consoled ourselves with the thought that docs and therapists and teachers and other parents would change their tune if they had to put up with difficult child's garbage for even a few days in their own home ?

    Well, you are not going to believe this....

    The doctor who has been working with us has
    OFFERED TO TAKE difficult child INTO HER HOME FOR TWO WEEKS OVER THE SUMMER!!!!!

    :surprise:

    I am STUNNED!!! And I am ready to pack difficult child's things TODAY before doctor changes her mind.

    (But husband wants to think it over....)

    Can you believe this?
     
  2. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    Is he out of his MIND????? Do it man!!!! Before the doctor changes her mind!

    Seriously though....is this a doctor that you trust implicitly? Much as I would be tempted to run right home and pack a bag...what is her reasoning for this? What does she hope to accomplish by doing this? I would definately get some answers before jumping right in.
     
  3. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Seriously...why? I always felt like you...You live with em for a day/week/month.

    But to have someone take us up on it kinda throws us for a loop now doesnt it? Hmmm.

    Does this doctor seem stable? Is your dtr able to call for help if need be? If so, then yeah, I think I would do it. Of course, it could backfire and difficult child could be a perfect angel for her. Ugh. Does difficult child honeymoon normally? Mine didnt so I didnt have that worry. Cory was an all purpose pita.
     
  4. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    As much as that seems to be an incredibly generous gesture, I would also be leery of agreeing to this too quickly. It is unorthodox and crosses the professional boundaries -- not saying it couldn't work out to be a good thing, but it's just not something that's typically done. Be careful.
     
  5. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I agree with the others- it is a conflict of interest for the doctor, I believe.
     
  6. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Agree with the others and have something else to add... Onyxx is capable of being an angel for months... Two weeks is a snap for her.
     
  7. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    I admit that I hadn't thought too much about all the potential negatives...

    The first being, of course, that I'm not sure who else lives with the doctor. I think she has a son in college who may or may not be spending the summer at home and who may or may not be bringing his college buddies over to hang out. That could be a HUGE potential problem right there.

    The way this all came about seemed innocent enough... (but if I'm being naive, please let me know! I trust you!)

    doctor is holding group sessions over the summer in a "day camp" type setting. She felt these sessions would be very beneficial to difficult child and she invited difficult child to particpate in the camp. Campers are dropped off in the morning around 9 and picked up at the end of the day around 5. That's all well and good....EXCEPT

    We are currently driving an HOUR one way for difficult child to see this doctor in the first place. If we have to make the trip during morning/afternoon rush it becomes over an hour.

    So there is no "dropping off" because I have no intention of making a 2 1/2 hour trip every morning and every evening so difficult child can go to camp--even if it is therapy. I do not know of anything else I could do for two weeks that would justify spending all day in town. So I told doctor I just didn't see how I could realistically make that happen...

    That's when doctor offered difficult child her guest bedroom for the duration of camp.

    So I don't know. I'd really like to send her...
     
  8. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    Ok so that sounds like a reasonable explanation but.....still. Does the docs boss know about this? If the doctor is willing to sit down with HER boss and you and work things out...maybe it's on the up and up. But if doctor is somewhat sneaky or secretive....I'd say no immediately.

    But.....if you think this camp would be beneficial and doctor would be willing to conditions/safety measures set in place by you and witnessed by others....maybe it's something to think about. Know what I mean??
     
  9. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Ok...Im chiming in from something I just talked about with my therapist...or now former therapist. We have had to sever our professional relationship for a number of reasons one of the major ones is that we have probably crossed some invisible client/therapist lines.

    She is a very nice woman who I have sooooo much in common with. We both have difficult child's. We both have granddaughters the same age. We both have fibro though hers just started about 2 years ago. She was divorced about a year ago and has bought a house and needs help on it because the contractor she got originally left her in the lurch so Tony is helping her work on her house. So...we have become pretty good friends outside the walls of the therapy room. In fact for most of the last year we havent even met in her office, its always for lunch where we do our sessions.

    Plus my insurance wont pay for her anymore. But I was going to pay for her out of pocket once a month or so but we have decided to have me see someone new and sever out professional relationship and just be friends. Works for me.

    However, if you dont have that type of friendship we do, crossing any of those boundaries is very iffy. We went back and forth for several months about me even knowing where she lived for Tony to go work on her house. That was a biggie. Thats when we started deciding to back off on our professional relationship because that really made the ties too close.

    Now maybe it wouldnt be a problem in your case. Just something to think about.
     
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