did not go quite the way we hoped.
As always, difficult child put on the "I'm a perfect kid" face....and husband and I were no doubt wearing our "I'm stressed out and exhausted" faces. So there was no talk about having difficult child hospitalized. In fact, the really bad news is that the doctor, at this point, seems to think the whole thing is behavioral--that we, as parents, have allowed difficult child to get into some bad habits and she is playing us like a violin.
The doctor has suggested we implement
[drum roll please]
a behavior chart. Ta-Daaahhh!!!
--sigh--
But I must say, overall, I like this doctor. The doctor could clearly see that we were not excited about the behavior chart proposal, but she pointed out that if difficult child is mentally ill, she is mentally ill whether there is a behavior chart or not. She suggested we document difficult child's ability to stick to the behavior chart as part of the assesment.
Which seems like a darn good idea to me.
So I have designed a behavior chart that is pretty easy and straightforward, but will be very difficult for difficult child to stick to. I based it on the idea of those "shopper rewards cards" where you earn a little each week and redeem for prizes....old points expire after one month.
difficult child will be required to act responsibly in four categories: Conduct, Hygiene, Chores and Schoolwork.
And because difficult child is perfectly capable of keeping it together for short periods of time, the points are earned weekly--not daily. IOW, she has to shower regularly, wear clean clothes, use deoderant etc for the entire week...to get credit for acting responsibly in the Hygiene category.
I have devised the scoring so that difficult child must be fairly successful in all four categories in order to earn any rewards at all. And I have tiered the rewards so that big rewards (like going to a friend's house) can only be earned after four continuous weeks of being really successful in all four categories.
If difficult child earns the privlidege of going to a friend's house, I will be stunned!!!
And if she is barely able to even earn the first level of rewards, I will ask that the doctor explain why a nearly fifteen year old young woman is having so much trouble with showering, cleaning her room, doing homework and acting/speaking appropriately with others.
This should be interesting...
--DaisyFace
As always, difficult child put on the "I'm a perfect kid" face....and husband and I were no doubt wearing our "I'm stressed out and exhausted" faces. So there was no talk about having difficult child hospitalized. In fact, the really bad news is that the doctor, at this point, seems to think the whole thing is behavioral--that we, as parents, have allowed difficult child to get into some bad habits and she is playing us like a violin.
The doctor has suggested we implement
[drum roll please]
a behavior chart. Ta-Daaahhh!!!
--sigh--
But I must say, overall, I like this doctor. The doctor could clearly see that we were not excited about the behavior chart proposal, but she pointed out that if difficult child is mentally ill, she is mentally ill whether there is a behavior chart or not. She suggested we document difficult child's ability to stick to the behavior chart as part of the assesment.
Which seems like a darn good idea to me.
So I have designed a behavior chart that is pretty easy and straightforward, but will be very difficult for difficult child to stick to. I based it on the idea of those "shopper rewards cards" where you earn a little each week and redeem for prizes....old points expire after one month.
difficult child will be required to act responsibly in four categories: Conduct, Hygiene, Chores and Schoolwork.
And because difficult child is perfectly capable of keeping it together for short periods of time, the points are earned weekly--not daily. IOW, she has to shower regularly, wear clean clothes, use deoderant etc for the entire week...to get credit for acting responsibly in the Hygiene category.
I have devised the scoring so that difficult child must be fairly successful in all four categories in order to earn any rewards at all. And I have tiered the rewards so that big rewards (like going to a friend's house) can only be earned after four continuous weeks of being really successful in all four categories.
If difficult child earns the privlidege of going to a friend's house, I will be stunned!!!
And if she is barely able to even earn the first level of rewards, I will ask that the doctor explain why a nearly fifteen year old young woman is having so much trouble with showering, cleaning her room, doing homework and acting/speaking appropriately with others.
This should be interesting...
--DaisyFace