Out of steam

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by llamafarm, Mar 8, 2012.

  1. llamafarm

    llamafarm New Member

    You know, it has been days since I have accomplished anything. I am exhausted. Of course I am not surprised, but the not getting things done is piling up all sorts of messes around here. I have allowed myself some slack, but this is getting ridiculous. Dishes seem like such a chore ( I do get to them, often right before the kids come home), I have no desire to make a dinner (I do this too, often mac and cheese or hot dogs), laundry is slowly getting done day by day (thought the quote "I need clean underwear is driving me nuts"). So there are some successes. I can't decide if it is the late nights (though many nights I am in bed by 8:30), the future move to we don't know where yet, the stress of husband hunting for a new job, seeing the futility of my own job, difficult child having his typical exhausting issues, or worrying about DDD or the dog's mental health. Maybe all the above. I need some words of motivation.
  2. addie

    addie New Member

    This too will pass? Time of year, I think, not knowing your history. It is 1.30 here and I haven't got dressed yet. Grey, rainy weather. I see crocuses (crocii?) in your picture. If I saw even a green shoot here, I think it would bring a smile to my face.
    but it would take a lot more than that for me to get moving, preparing a meal, painting trim (yawn), sorting clutter, etc.
    so no suggestions that could motivate, BUT you could do what I do - try not to beat yourself up over it.
    Again, this, and whatever the reason for it, WILL pass.
    been there done that with gigs in the house and time of year plus the drag of the daily aggro is wearing.
    Some people take extra Vitamin D. I am trying that, but can't say I notice much of a difference. I find drinking water energizes.

  3. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It


    I am sorry. It all sounds pretty stressful. Why not let he who is out of clean underwear throw a load in? Your kids are old enough to do some chores, though it can be a hassle. Getting them to do the chores is a hassle I mean. There are ways to make chores less work for you, and to get them to help more. I would start by having separate laundry baskets for dark, colored and white laundry. Then when a basket is full they get thrown in the laundry. It made a HUGe difference for us when I did this. OF course husband and the kids didn't want to sort their clothesi nto the right bins. SO I made sure MY clothes were washed separately and let them wash theirs all together. It didn't take long for pink underwear to make difficult child unhappy and for a stain on a favorite white tshirt to make husband unhappy. So then the clothes were sorted and I never yelled or fussed. If it didn't get into the baskets? I didnt wash it and if it went too long not n the basket? I threw it away. Uniforms for sports or whatever I would hold hostage and the ransom was usually an hour's worth of chores. The kids offered to just pay me instead but when I wanted $20 they daughter the chores. They whined and fussed and drove me nuts with all of the above things, and when it got bad I made them run laps around the house. That used up a lot of energy, esp wth mom sitting there with a cup of coffee yelling "Faster, that one didn't count because this isn't walking laps! Good Job!" in my opinion this is a key to surviving with adhd kids because it uses up some of that energy.

    Those are suggestions that worked for me. As for meals, if they like hot dogs and mac and cheese, that is fine. Otherwise, I found throwing stuff in the crock pot to be a big help.

    What would your kids like to learn to cook? Ten or eleven is when my kids started their cookbooks. They periodically wanted to learn to make something, and cooking is a lesson that they will need for survival later. So I started having them make the hot dogs and write down the directions. As they got better in the kitchen, they made more elaborate stuff. I don't know if your kids are developmentally ready to use the stove, but they could make ham and cheese sandwiches and serve them with applesauce, carrots and ranch, and chips for dinner. Yes, it is simple. Call it a picnic at the table.

    These are techniques to take the load off of your shoulders. Ones that worked for me when I was ready to use them. This might not be the right time to use them for you and your family. SO maybe they will sit in the back of your mind and in a few months or years you will be ready and you will think of them. Just remember that if the whole load goes on one set of shoulders you can't carry even half of what the family needs. The load has to be spread over the shoulders of the entire family, not just on Mom's shoulders. There is nothing wrong and everything right with having your kids do chores to help the family.

    For an immediate lift, go for teh B vitamins. D vits may help if you have seasonal affective disorder and the lack of sunlight is a problem for you. B vitamins give you an instant boost of energy and are super helpful. I knew a bunch of engineering students in college and they didn't drink more coffee or cokes for finals, they took vit B. It gives you neon yellow urine, but it also gives you a ton of energy without the caffeine jitters. It is part of what makes those little energy boosters work, and a bottle of vit B is a ton cheaper than those things. Look for something with more than one B vitamin in it, either a B complex or even "super B" on the label. Most vit brands used to offer a mix of B vitamins called super B and they were different for each brand but they all worked pretty much the same.

    I hope you feel better soon, and that maybe one day soon the ideas I suggested will be something that can help.

  4. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    I don't have any advice, but I know exactly how you feel and you have my sympathies.
  5. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    I'm betting the majority of it is a combination of stress and the time of the year.

    I mean, gee, did you look outside today?? I had some major big cleaning plans but the dark and dreary got to me so bad I went back for a nap instead. :sigh: Of course you may not be as far south as me so I dunno maybe you didn't get the gloomy day.

    Now? I'm trying to talk myself into going out into the cold rain to go to walmart with easy child. ick I hate cold rain. But I need bread. Dishes are backed up so I couldn't bake it if I found the motivation. lol

    Tackle what you can, when you can (this applies for most everything by the way) and try hard not to worry about the rest. Make sure you're making some "me" time, even if it's like a half hour in your room curled up with a good book with the door locked. And when the sun pops out, go take a longish walk to soak in it's rays and all their vit D. Those rays will help lift your mood some, as will the exercise and the time out of the house.

  6. keista

    keista New Member

    All I got for you is ((((HUGS)))) When things get tough, I say to heck with the daily chores. I take time for me. If I"m not focused, I can't be effective for my kids. Dishes and laundry and vacuuming all eventually get done. maybe not the way they should, but enough to survive.

    Emotional stability is much more important. Go get that Calgon!
  7. greenrene

    greenrene Member

    I am SO right there with you. My house is a disaster, my laundry is piled up (clean and dirty)... Hang in there! I'm trying to as well...