Star*
call 911........call 911
After careful consideration I am opening my own company. I'm selling decorative, colorful duct tape to women with PMDD.
Sold the first roll to myself this morning.....
DF never schedules any of his appointments for in the morning. Okay fine. That leaves me to do my ROUTINE and get out without incident.
Last night I asked DF about the appointment. he had today. He said "I can only get in at 8:00 AM" - okay so you are going to shower and get ready tonight right? I'll do my stuff in the morning like usual." - YUP.....
PRAY FOR THIS MAN -
He got up late. He stayed in the bathroom so long - I could not get my shower. Let's be honest - we've already HAD the thread on why you can't go in a bathroom behind a man without a gas mask and you can NOT shower with a gas mask ON. So that was out - NO biggie - I'm relatively clean. Hair ? Okay - I'll pull it back.....
SO I go out to the kitchen.....and there he is. Moving like ........a.......snail........a.........n........old..........snail........oh......ow.
And I can SMELL coffee, but I can't SEE coffee because he's m.o.v.i.n.g. s.o. s.l.o.w. so I got my shoes and lunch - and trying to get out because yes.....yes....I have to be to work ON TIME.....and then it happened.
The man who NEVER EVER eats breakfast is standing in the kitchen with MY POPTART.....OMG there is nothing else FOR breakfast......I'm too. late. to. stop. and. get. a. biscuit. (wonder why) and there he stands tongue deep in MY BLUEBERRY UNFROSTED BLINKITY BLINKING POP TART.
(breathe ------he is trying)
SO I go to make my commuter cup travel mug - the ONLY mug I use EVERY SINGLE DAY, DAY AFER DAY AFTER DAY AFTER.....and it's gone. Maybe I left it in the dishwasher *(nope_) in the SUV???? NOooo I brought it in....it was here..but I go check. ANd as I'm walking back in the house - here comes the MUFFIN man - with MY MUG!!!!!! SO I poured my coffee in a smaller, less likeable but doable mug...and left.
It was more than I could do - I slapped my hand over my mouth, drove off, and ignored the pleas I heard from the drive - "WHATS WRONG? and then the BOMB....WHAT's WRONG NOW?" and the now set me off......
I backed up - teetering between slaying this bathroom stinking, poptart eating, coffee cup stealing man and wishing him away with a blink.....smiled and said HAVE A NICE DAY HON.....
I swear - I think the highway Godz KNEW I have PMDD, no bath, poptart, no mug and no.......hey WHERE is my dinky conformist mug? OMG I forgot it ON THE COUNTER......at home.
SO to all of you who have days like this and think you may kill someone with words - for a mere $15.00 I will be glad to ship you PRIORITY MAIL a package of my new line of marriage saving, relationship improving PMDD day mouth tape.
Cause it's the ONLY thing that saved old Poptart butt this morning.
Sold the first roll to myself this morning.....
DF never schedules any of his appointments for in the morning. Okay fine. That leaves me to do my ROUTINE and get out without incident.
Last night I asked DF about the appointment. he had today. He said "I can only get in at 8:00 AM" - okay so you are going to shower and get ready tonight right? I'll do my stuff in the morning like usual." - YUP.....
PRAY FOR THIS MAN -
He got up late. He stayed in the bathroom so long - I could not get my shower. Let's be honest - we've already HAD the thread on why you can't go in a bathroom behind a man without a gas mask and you can NOT shower with a gas mask ON. So that was out - NO biggie - I'm relatively clean. Hair ? Okay - I'll pull it back.....
SO I go out to the kitchen.....and there he is. Moving like ........a.......snail........a.........n........old..........snail........oh......ow.
And I can SMELL coffee, but I can't SEE coffee because he's m.o.v.i.n.g. s.o. s.l.o.w. so I got my shoes and lunch - and trying to get out because yes.....yes....I have to be to work ON TIME.....and then it happened.
The man who NEVER EVER eats breakfast is standing in the kitchen with MY POPTART.....OMG there is nothing else FOR breakfast......I'm too. late. to. stop. and. get. a. biscuit. (wonder why) and there he stands tongue deep in MY BLUEBERRY UNFROSTED BLINKITY BLINKING POP TART.
(breathe ------he is trying)
SO I go to make my commuter cup travel mug - the ONLY mug I use EVERY SINGLE DAY, DAY AFER DAY AFTER DAY AFTER.....and it's gone. Maybe I left it in the dishwasher *(nope_) in the SUV???? NOooo I brought it in....it was here..but I go check. ANd as I'm walking back in the house - here comes the MUFFIN man - with MY MUG!!!!!! SO I poured my coffee in a smaller, less likeable but doable mug...and left.
It was more than I could do - I slapped my hand over my mouth, drove off, and ignored the pleas I heard from the drive - "WHATS WRONG? and then the BOMB....WHAT's WRONG NOW?" and the now set me off......
I backed up - teetering between slaying this bathroom stinking, poptart eating, coffee cup stealing man and wishing him away with a blink.....smiled and said HAVE A NICE DAY HON.....
I swear - I think the highway Godz KNEW I have PMDD, no bath, poptart, no mug and no.......hey WHERE is my dinky conformist mug? OMG I forgot it ON THE COUNTER......at home.
SO to all of you who have days like this and think you may kill someone with words - for a mere $15.00 I will be glad to ship you PRIORITY MAIL a package of my new line of marriage saving, relationship improving PMDD day mouth tape.
Cause it's the ONLY thing that saved old Poptart butt this morning.