timer lady
Queen of Hearts
I loved honoring my mother, mother in law, & grandmothers & great grandmothers. Saying that, it wasn't just one day of the year....it was a life long love & respect for these lovely women in my life.
I was honored as the mother to my children by my late husband.....
I expect nothing this year.....haven't for years from the tweedles. I had the courage to ask both kt & wm if they were grateful to have me in their lives. kt, of course, told me that she was grateful & loved being my daughter. wm, on the other hand, is focusing on bio mom ~ how life would be so much better with her.
My response to kt was "if you're so grateful to be my daughter, why do those words not match your actions, your choices, your daily verbal bullying". kt got very sheepish & made some off hand excuse - I'm 16 what do you expect.
"I expect a level of respect that is due to all members of your family. I expect to be treated better than you treat a complete stranger or your closest friends."
I saw my therapist yesterday & mentioned the thread on this board about child envy. I discussed how committed the mothers on this board are every day. How that thread really affected me.
The bottom line is that I can't say honestly that I love kt & wm. I know I don't like them much. Honestly, I don't know that I'd throw myself in front of a bus to save them. I have fantasies of them finding their bio mum & moving back in with her. I have fantasies of being arrested & put in jail for respite.
I'm not posting this for the hugs or the I'm sorry kind of stuff. Just want to know if any of you no longer feel the love a parent should have for their children.
My reality of mother's day is that I'm not a mom ~ I'm a caregiver & guardian.
I was honored as the mother to my children by my late husband.....
I expect nothing this year.....haven't for years from the tweedles. I had the courage to ask both kt & wm if they were grateful to have me in their lives. kt, of course, told me that she was grateful & loved being my daughter. wm, on the other hand, is focusing on bio mom ~ how life would be so much better with her.
My response to kt was "if you're so grateful to be my daughter, why do those words not match your actions, your choices, your daily verbal bullying". kt got very sheepish & made some off hand excuse - I'm 16 what do you expect.
"I expect a level of respect that is due to all members of your family. I expect to be treated better than you treat a complete stranger or your closest friends."
I saw my therapist yesterday & mentioned the thread on this board about child envy. I discussed how committed the mothers on this board are every day. How that thread really affected me.
The bottom line is that I can't say honestly that I love kt & wm. I know I don't like them much. Honestly, I don't know that I'd throw myself in front of a bus to save them. I have fantasies of them finding their bio mum & moving back in with her. I have fantasies of being arrested & put in jail for respite.
I'm not posting this for the hugs or the I'm sorry kind of stuff. Just want to know if any of you no longer feel the love a parent should have for their children.
My reality of mother's day is that I'm not a mom ~ I'm a caregiver & guardian.